SRS Anonymous post...motivation problems.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by dave steel, Nov 14, 2006.

  1. dave steel

    dave steel My Kung Fu is the best.

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    Anonymous Post? Motivation problems
    I was hoping you could make an anonymous post for me, thank you.

    I have severe motivation issues. I currently am only taking two classes after dropping one, and have no job. I dropped the first one because I didn't do any of the homework and didn't study for the midterm and so I didn't take the midterm and instead dropped the course. I'm an engineering major at one of the top engineering schools in the country, and yet I don't feel any push to do well. That's not to say I'm not aware of pressures, I'm all too aware of the pressure to do very well in college, get a great career, have internships, etc. But, when it comes down to it, I just don't make the effort, and I don't know why.

    I currently have a 3.0, and am very afraid it will dip below that after this quarter. I'm also premedical, and only need a couple more classes to fulfill that. It will take me 5 years to graduate (this is my 4th year) due to a combination of transferring schools, taking extra biology and chemistry classes for the premed stuff, and being LAZY. Last year, I took a total of 7 classes (quarter system). PATHETIC, and I know it. Last year I did have a job 20 hours a week though.

    I chose engineering originally because I was filling out my college apps with only a few days to turn them in, and had to pick something. I didn't want to choose a stereotypical non-professional major, like English, History, Communication, etc. However, I've always been very technically oriented and very good at things related to machines and technology. So, I ticked the engineering box on the online application. Engineering interests me to a point, I enjoy tinkering around with it and giving friends advice related to it, but I think I'm more interested in the hands-on aspect.

    Everyone knows an engineer has to love math, right? Wrong. An engineer must be good at math, not like it. I didn't try hard enough with vector and multivariable calculus, and it's hurting me now, but that's ok. Here's part of my problem, I'm smart. You're thinking, 'this guy is real modest', right? Usually I am, but this is not the time to be be modest to the point of mis-construing the truth. Being smart has been both to be advantage and disadvantage throughout my education. In K-12, it's great. I'm the guy that NEVER studies for tests or papers, anything. I'm serious, I don't remember a single time in high school where I studied for anything, and I managed to get out of there with a 3.8 unweighted and 32 community college credits. Now comes college... "oh shit, I have to study now, everyone is smart here". I'm sure some have you have experienced this. Now, college is the time where the guys/gals that struggled through high school because they weren't as smart as some, but made the effort, excel. They may not catch on as quick, but they work damn hard to learn the material and do well. I never had to learn those skills, never had to try.

    Now, 3 years of college and I still don't know HOW to try. Seems nuts, and it's hurting me life all around. My gf gets frustrated with me when I don't try harder to apply for jobs when she has 5 classes and 2 jobs. My parents are disappointed. My friends probably wonder what I'm doing as well. I guess one "problem" is I've never really HAD to work for anything. My family is well enough off that they'll support me for everything I NEED, and a lot of what I want. I've held jobs, just because I want extra money to spend. I'm spoiled, I know it, and a lot of times I wish I never was given so much so that I'd be forced to struggle and work hard.

    I have ambitions. I want to be a doctor, I really do. Before college I hated doctors, like a lot of people. Not personally hated, but hated the idea. I've had 4 surgeries, 2 major, 2 minor, and had to deal with doctors a lot. Dealing with doctors usually means you're there due to pain. Sure, doctors help with pain, right? Everyone knows that, but we still associate doctors with sickness, pain, etc. Not until college did I associate them with the proper things: respect, helping, nobleness, etc. That's what I associate them with now anyway. I want to help people, plain and simple. I see it as a job I would never cease loving, one that could support me in a way that I wouldn't have to be concerned each month about money, and one that would leave me personally satisfied.

    All that said, I know I'll never get there at this rate. I almost feel like I'm deluding myself thinking I have the ambition to be a doctor, because if I had that ambition, I'd be doing everything in my power to achieve it, right? I'm not sure sometimes.

    What I'm looking for here is how to become truly motivated, develop hard working habits, etc. Can this be fixed on my own, through therapy, therapy plus medication? I know I need help, I'm just not sure where to get it, because it doesn't seem that I will gather it within myself to just "go for it". And I'm also at the point where I think, maybe I don't deserve to be a doctor or have grand ambitions if I am not capable of motivating myself. Maybe I am the person that ends up working the dead end job, but I want so badly not to be that person. I know I have the talent to do a lot of things, and I want to know how I can utilize it. Help?

    It's 2am and I apologize for the length, thanks for taking the time to read.
     
  2. bimmer318

    bimmer318 I'm out of applesauce

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    Wow that's pretty long....well I gotta say that for now just stick with your degree and graduate. Out in the real world it will be a little easier picking what you want to do.. You might work as an engineer in a medical field, perhaps in the manufacturing of medical supplies? I'm sure you'd find that enjoyable. I don't know what engineering major you are in but a degree in sciences or engineering is among of the most versatile, you have the most options after graduation, than any arts graduate would dream of having..

    So I think you should just stick throuh it, and since you have a light course load, try doing some more research in the medical field and see how you can apply your degree, and maybe get a job as well...

    Good luck
     
  3. LudaMan

    LudaMan Active Member

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    I'm in the same boat as you dude, too supportive of parents, no motivation, same high school situation, and gf gets mad because i have no job and am not trying to get one while she has 2 jobs and is in the air guard. All I can say is just stick it out, i've been talking to an advisor on campus and that has helped tremendously, and I should transfer to the college I've always wanted to go to next year. Talk to an advisor if you can, and good luck to you!
     
  4. Memor

    Memor Active Member

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    I'm in the same boat as you as well - the description of how you are and your earlier life is eerily similar to mine. Hopefully transferring schools in a semester or two and reprioritizing things will get me my wakeup call. Lookin for the answer to all this here as well :hs:
     
  5. Johnny Sack

    Johnny Sack Penis?

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    You should look into wether or not you have ADD
     
  6. Toasty

    Toasty Naked people have little or no influence on societ

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    It's possible you've been trying to hard to be an engineer or doctor when it's really not your calling. I spent a good portion of K-12 and a couple years on college thinking I was going into the medical field only to feel totally displaced...eventually I realized I was only in it not to disappoint my family.

    What broke the barrier for me was finally sitting down with my parents one night and they helped me realize it didn't matter what I ended up doing as a career...they'd support it. The release felt good...changed majors & my motivation and grades improved.

    You should really spend some serious time thinking about what's the real reason you're pursuing these fields....is it really what you want or are you just going through the motions?

    Another thing I found about motivation is that it often comes by surrounding yourself with people who are highly motivated. Their energy just naturally pulls you forward. I think this is generally true of people who are very successful in life...they surround themselves with other people who are more successful then they are.
     

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