ATTENTION: Dicksocks...Im going to post this ONCE and FOR ALL.......

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by Patrick Bateman, Aug 3, 2005.

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  1. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    I'm sick of you assboogers IM'ing me with one of the following questions:

    "Hey bateman its <insert your dumb ot names here>, how do i get huge?"

    or

    "Hey bateman its <one of you dumbasses>, How do i get ripped?"

    First off, youre probably thinking "why do you get so mad?" I'll tell you why you cumrangers. 99.5% of the time I do not know you, this means by default I do not know what you look like, what your mother looks like, what your father looks like, whether youre an ectomorph, whether youre a mesomorph, endomorph, how old you are, what you weigh, whether or not you work out, whether or not you even know what a gym is, what you eat, what you have access to eating....I can go on and on for days. It's fucking irritating especially when you literally get 35 im's and pm's per day with the same nonsense. [/rant]

    Now on to what I PERSONALLY did.....(Note, Keyword here is "personally" because it may not apply or work for you at all, I am an EXTREME ectomorph)
    I started out at a soakin wet 145lbs at 6'0 about 3 1/2 years ago. Balls to the wall I fucking decided I'd do ANYTHING I could to look like the "dudes in soundfactory" (the first time I went I was shocked......I was the smallest one there and I was a complete stressed out mess the next morning. I felt like shit and from that day on I told myself I would do everything in my power to get big and ripped like those fucks with their shirts off) Stupid? Yeah kind of because now I could give two fucks and just have a deep passion for all this......So there I went, got a gym membership, got a buddy of mine who lifted and knew some-what a lot about it (well for that time and for me) to show me exercises and give me a routine (started out with shoulders/tris, back/bis, chest, legs) 4-day split, no cardio whatsoever. Saw pretty fucking good results for the first two weeks and knew I'd stick with it from there on. After a couple months my gains sort of plateau'd and I started reading a lot more about nutrition and supplements. I decided I needed to start eating a lot more, I was eating clean, but going wrong about it, because I needed as much cals as possible. I STARTED EATING FUCKING EVERYTHING in sight. I didnt give a fuck whether it was clean, dirty, jizzed, on shat on, I didnt care, I would visit A. a pizza place always during my day, B. mcdonalds, C. store to get a gallon of milk, and the rest consisted of steak , potatoes, pasta, beans, rice, chicken, turkey sandwiches, yogurts, cheeses, ice cream, cakes, whatever the fuck I could get my hands on. in 1 1/2 years I was up to 215 solid...after a pump - veins were all of my upper body.....still had a pretty good "outline" of a six pack. At this point I cut down to 175 within ~another 3/4 of a year or so and began maintaining/clean bulking, practically to the point where I'm at now. I now DO cardio, usually 3-4 days a week, even though I really do not need it.

    My current split is pretty much like my initial one, i guess a bit different.

    Chest/bis
    shoulders
    back/tris
    legs


    abs 2 days a week, just basic fucking stomach crunches, and basic fucking leg raises. 3 sets each......~25 reps. Not a fucking big deal.

    I lifted heavier almost to max when I was bulking, now I dont go under 6 repetetitions for anything. usually do rep ranges of 12-8.

    For the most part I do compound exercises as well as variations and accompanying machine work etc. I go through my workouts FAST PACED....to keep my heart rate up and get some cardio in during my weight training......so I only rest for about 15-45 seconds MAX in between sets, I do a lot of DROP SET WORK as well.

    I hope this clears shit up for you all, and I dont have to answer any more stupid fucking questions........

    Remember, this is the HUMAN body, its not a fucking puzzle, where all pieces fit generically, everybody is DIFFERENT......I can pound ridiculously disgusting calorie filled whoppers for a month and still be leaner than any of you cumstains will ever be eating a can of tuna for months. Sucks? but guess what building mass is probably easier for you.......some have this, some have that. Thank you and have a nice day.

    Basic summarization/Cliff notes.

    Bulking = (for me) EATING EVERYTHING in sight. I try to consume 6000+ calories. This has worked great for me. This mostly consists of carbs such as pastas, pizza, whoppers, big macs, steaks, chicken, subs, protein bars, TONS OF MILK (2%), Nuts, Fruits, Ice cream, etc.

    Training = Lower reps, more rest, no cardio, bi-weekly max-outs.

    Cutting = (for me) ~2500-3,000 calories per day, yo-yo diet typically, 1 high carb day with complex whole wheat carbs such as brown rice, oats, fruits, etc. ~300grams of protein, followed by an average day ~150-200 grams of carbs, followed by a LOW day where the only carbs I consume are via shakes, and veggies.

    Training = Higher reps, cardio 3-4 times per day, little short rest periods in between sets/exercises. Cardio usually is done post training on elliptical or treadmill for 20-25 minutes. heart rate of ~140-160.

    Most important key factors that I've learned about building muscle during my short haul at this:


    • Pre and Post workout nutrition is key
    • If you want to be big and grow you need to shock your body with a surplus of calories, and cant be a pussy about it and worry about fat gain, I didnt care when I bulked
    • If you want to cut, its the opposite you have to be paranoid about the littlest things and try to cheat as little as possible, its all determination
    • if youre young, friends/social shit will get in the way, try to pack lunches/dinners/RTD's with you and tune out all the people who will be talking shit
    • The main reason people fail is diet, most people have training down pretty good and are intense in the gym, but 97% i'd say dont know how to properly eat and diet, thats where they fail, give up and are vaginas. its 75% diet i would say, ATLEAST if not more.
    • Do your research yourself, you learn this just as you learn anything else, it wont come over night, but you have to eat breathe and sleep "growth" and bodybuilding or you'll accomplish very little.

    Favorite Supplements of mine that I frequently use:

    Solgar Multivitamins
    Vasopro Ephedrine HCl
    Yohimbine
    Caffeine
    Redline RTD's
    Myoplex RTD's
    Muscle Milk RTD's (Cookies N Creme Flavor or chocolate :yum:)
    Flax Seed Oil
    Isopure RTD's and mixes on my zero carb days.
    NO-Xplode (Just started using this recently, no bloat and some good pumps I guess :dunno: never really used any crap like this before but got it for free and thought i'd try it, not bad)
     
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2005
  2. Lurker111

    Lurker111 New Member

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    How do I get huge and ripped? btw this is lurker111 off of OT.

    Thanks!

    edit- roughly 1lb a week and you kept bodyfat low...pretty damn good. I put on a decent amount of fat going 1-2lbs a week. Then again I'm a bit older.
     
  3. Mugwump

    Mugwump Guest

    You tell 'em, Dave!
     
  4. SteveO

    SteveO Guest

    :rofl: jizzed on food, that's some desperate shit man
     
  5. Regnevelc

    Regnevelc New Member

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    I wish I could eat what I want to stay lean, but yes, I like how you drive in there, every body is different do what works for you. But you will always get the people who try to copy what other people do and get discouraged.

    I am happy that I can gain a ton of mass quickly, but I cant get to a low bodyfat(14 - 15% at the lowest and that is tough) for the life of me.
     
  6. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    With harder work and discipline you could.
     
  7. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    How about I jizz in your hair?
     
  8. SteveO

    SteveO Guest

    eat a cock nigga
     
  9. Regnevelc

    Regnevelc New Member

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    I know, but I dont mind hanging around there, its lean enough for me right now at least until New Years rolls around, then its diet diet diet until the cruise.
     
  10. y0gfx

    y0gfx BURAAAJYANAII!!!

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    Do you happen to have before/after pics?
     
  11. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    I've posted them before........too lazy right now.
     
  12. cavefish

    cavefish You ain't a crook son, you just a shook one

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    How can I get delts that make the niggas sweat and gets the bitches wet?
     
  13. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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  14. SteveO

    SteveO Guest

    bateman, i think that girl is showing you up
     
  15. whoismrskantz

    whoismrskantz Active Member

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    good read

    bateman > *

    this should be a sticky. seriously.
     
  16. Maverik60

    Maverik60 New Member

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    bateman post a pic all i hear is bateman this batemans huge never seen it only seen that ab shot that had Muscle milk & oats lol
     
  17. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    I'm not huge......I do fitness modeling so by default thats not "huge" and by my statistics that I just wrote up there being at ~185-190 at 6'0-6'1 that is not HUGE.......but I have a good build and I have accomplished what I needed to accomplish, obviously its a never ending battle, but thats that.

    some pics are here

    www.myspace.com/gymtime
     
  18. moses

    moses OMGWTFBBQ

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    :eek3:

    this is the first thread i've seen bateman make that isn't talking about himself
     
  19. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    :ugh:
     
  20. moses

    moses OMGWTFBBQ

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    calm down buddy, just joking :big grin:
     
  21. Patrick Bateman

    Patrick Bateman OT Supporter

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    it is about me though.........its about my routine and how i got the way i am....... :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: thats why i gave you the :ugh:
     
  22. cavefish

    cavefish You ain't a crook son, you just a shook one

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    First time I've seen real pics, pretty impressive work. If I could get down to your bf% I'd be one swole beast.
     
  23. dmaestro

    dmaestro New Member

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    this thread is seriously lacking hot bateman bathroom pics :mamoru:
     
  24. FusterCluck

    FusterCluck omfg

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    after staring for quite some time, i really think thats a man in your av.
     
  25. SteveO

    SteveO Guest

    go eat a twinky fatty

    seriously, you would be a big dude if you did. Maybe you'll show up that one powerlifter that went from 320 to 260 !
     
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