http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder So yeah...that's me in a nutshell. I know you shouldn't self-diagnose, but it describes how I feel & live my life to a note. It also describes my history, my dad was paralyzed when I was young and my mom spent all her time taking care of him (which I totally respect). I kind of turned off my emotions at that point (or so I thought at the time). In college I socialized a little, but really only dated one girl. Once college ended and that group scattered to the winds of real life, I have had trouble making new friends and dating for exactly the reason described. Looking for advice from anyone with experience, really. I just changed jobs so going to a psychologist is out of the question for at least 90 days (insurance). Still, I'd like to do something. I'm a computer programmer (wha? no social contact) but I enjoy meeting and working with others as long as there's a goal, mission, or task to accomplish. As soon as it becomes social, I'm suddenly very uncomfortable and awkward. What's weird is that I know my co-workers genuinely like me as a person (on an intellectual level, I know it anyway), but I can't help but constantly second and third-guess everything to the point of not being social at all. I just go home instead. Yes. Completely. I can make small talk and even go on a couple of dates with a girl, but as soon as it becomes obvious she might like me back or I think I might like here I start withdrawing from the relationship, even though I don't want to do it. Which kind of sucks, because I may have just lost a totally great girl because of it. Yes, so I avoid them completely and get my socialization through professional situations and through structured night classes. I know I want more, I want to have friends over to the house to hang out and watch movies, play games, and generally hang out...but I just can't take that step. hahahaha....yes. always. 100% afraid of both failure and success. There are things I am very insecure about and consider them dealbreakers in the social sphere sometimes, but over all I've overcome this. Yup.