When I graduated college and didn't immediately start grad school/get a full time job, I lost my prescription coverage and thus lost access to the antidepressants I'd been on for the last year. Before that I was... not quite suicidal but intensely self-destructive. I self-injured, drank to the point of alcohol poisoning more than once, destroyed every relationship I had, etc. It was bad. The last year has been amazing though. It hasn't been SOLELY the antidepressants, but also a lifestyle change involving spending several months in another country with some of the most incredible people I've ever met. Unfortunately, moving back tot he states, moving home/away from those friends and losing m meds all coincided around the same month (May). Since then I feel the old me slowly stalking me and trying to creep back into my life. It's making it nearly impossible to force myself to get myself into grad school and find a job, even though it would be those very things that got me OUT of this... funk. *sigh* any advice?