LOVE Easy ways to come out?

Naturally Baked

Active Member
Sep 24, 2007
27,837
Detroit, Murder Mitten
I dont wanna do it alone....my parents wont accept it, I dont know how to do it...letter? E-mail? I just dont know, I feel like I should be there but I dont wanna see my mom or dad cry because of me. They do too much for me and I hate the fact I have to disapoint them but I feel like its osmething I have to do.

How?! I cant bring myself to just say "I AM GAY" to them
 
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Naturally Baked

Naturally Baked

Active Member
Sep 24, 2007
27,837
Detroit, Murder Mitten
god now that im actually getting into being "gay" as in looking for a relationship its all just so new and I feel like my life is completely changing this year...Im nots ure if its time or not to come out, atleast to my fam
 

Pen Is Mightier

I basically said "I am gay" when I came out and that's that. I was being asked why I was so depressed all the time and what was wrong, asking if I was doing drugs or something and I wanted to come out anyway so I just kind of blurted it out. :o

There is no easy way. I would say DO NOT write a letter/e-mail though even if that would make it so much easier...you still have to talk to them face to face about it SOMETIME, that just delays it. Maybe write up a letter beforehand and then read it to them? That makes it easier to have your thoughts already collected and not get side tracked or not know what to say.

I hope your coming out experience is a smooth one and that they don't take it too harshly.
 
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Naturally Baked

Naturally Baked

Active Member
Sep 24, 2007
27,837
Detroit, Murder Mitten
I basically said "I am gay" when I came out and that's that. I was being asked why I was so depressed all the time and what was wrong, asking if I was doing drugs or something and I wanted to come out anyway so I just kind of blurted it out. :o

There is no easy way. I would say DO NOT write a letter/e-mail though even if that would make it so much easier...you still have to talk to them face to face about it SOMETIME, that just delays it. Maybe write up a letter beforehand and then read it to them? That makes it easier to have your thoughts already collected and not get side tracked or not know what to say.

I hope your coming out experience is a smooth one and that they don't take it too harshly.

Could u ever see yourself before you were out coming out? because right now I just cant imagine myself being out to my parents, but I want to come out to them...you know? Its really weird, like, if they were accpeting and interested in my life id have no problem talking to them about it but I feel like it wouldnt be like that
 

Pen Is Mightier

No not at all. When I told my first friend, I was just thinking "wtf am I doing..." then after all was said and done I was glad I did. Especially my parents. I am a bad example of "normal" probably but I still am not at a point with my parents where they are accepting/interested in my gay life. My father is no longer in my life after my parents recently got divorced and I don't plan on talking to him for a while. I think I will give him one last chance to apologize/accept me around Christmas time.

I hope that one day my mother is truly accepting of me and interested in who I'm dating and things like that. At least be normal enough where I can bring him home and not have it be weird.

I do reccomend coming out though. That probably sounds obvious but in the long run you will have much more fun and be happier I believe. Even if your parents are not accepting at first, MOST parents come around eventually after they realize you are still their son and their flesh and blood.
 

novo

how's your dad?
OT Supporter
Oct 18, 2005
47,989
Low Haight
i would suggest doing it in person.

coming out to them face to face shows courage and independence which gives them more reason to respect you.
 
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Naturally Baked

Naturally Baked

Active Member
Sep 24, 2007
27,837
Detroit, Murder Mitten
ok the thing about it is my mom is so uneducated about gays that it makes it incredibly awkward for me...she talks shit about my cousin like "do you think hes the guy or the girl in the relationship?" Im like "mom its not realy like that, gays dont sit down and say, do you wanna play the girl or should i?" and she honestly believes we do....she used to love ellen but when ellen came out she hated her and didnt watch her show, same with rosie. Then when rosie was on the view she watched her but then i heard her say she didnt like when she talks about her gay relationships....

And they think me and my roommate are gay together. They always make fun of gays around me lately probably to see my reaction to it. They ask me if I think certain people are gay and do other shit...its just all so fucking awkward and im sick of it....they constantly tell me i need to go out with girls and stuff and I tell them Im not intersted in going out with girls right now lol
 

Pen Is Mightier

Sounds like they already think you're gay. :o You should just tell them. Before/after Xmas is your choice.
 

XPX

Active Member
Sep 14, 2002
12,037
they constantly tell me i need to go out with girls and stuff and I tell them Im not intersted in going out with girls right now lol


same here :o I tell them I have too many problems, responsabilities, goals and priorities right now....I think thats the most subtle method of telling them :o
 

BTCollins

I met a gypsy and she hipped me to some life game
Sep 20, 2007
620
Orlando, FL
Sounds like we are in the same position. My mom keeps bringing up awkward subjects that may or may not insinuate homosexuality, I too am torn how to tell her if she doesn't know already. Every party I come back from she asks if I found a girlfriend or not, the whole situation just feels awkward.
 

Bib-Lettuce

New Member
Oct 9, 2004
797
Well it seems a bit like they are baiting you, testing the waters, etc. Unfortunately I can't give any advice, i had it easy, my parents found porn and confronted me so all I had to do was confirm it and with friends I resorted to SMS and MSN. Don't know how our people made it by before technology.
 
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Naturally Baked

Naturally Baked

Active Member
Sep 24, 2007
27,837
Detroit, Murder Mitten
Sounds like we are in the same position. My mom keeps bringing up awkward subjects that may or may not insinuate homosexuality, I too am torn how to tell her if she doesn't know already. Every party I come back from she asks if I found a girlfriend or not, the whole situation just feels awkward.

yep, every time I come home for the day from school they keep thinking I have a date. I went home saturday to do laundry and my moms like "why are you leaving? who's the girl?" im like "uh, im going home because my 360 is up there and I wanna play gears of war 2 :mamoru:" and shes like "oh sure, who is she?".....it just gets old.
 

elevator

The tenants think it's wonderful! ヽ(´
OT Supporter
Mar 25, 2005
10,943
Houston, TX
parents are the hardest. whatever you do, you will feel like you are disappointing them because they aren't going to respond the way you want them to. Friends are easy - just drop subtle hints and then get obvious. im pretty sure my friends know im gay. typical aim convo with male friends:

me: lulz, you got tina fey glasses
him: do you like them
him: haha
me: yes, they make me want to do dirty things to you
him: awkward
me: HAWT
him: wel i am going to play volleyball.
me: k, im going to go fap to your glasses pic
him: which is your favorite
me: tell nick i said hay
me: which what
him: pic
me: glasses are new... and now i can skeet on you without hurting your eyes...
me: ill pic glasses for today
him: haha
him: ok
him: talk to you later freak
me: l8er bigger freak

:mamoru:
 

elevator

The tenants think it's wonderful! ヽ(´
OT Supporter
Mar 25, 2005
10,943
Houston, TX

You, too, can graduate to speaking with your straight guy friends like this :eek3:

We also grab each other's junk/butt and lick/bite each other on a regular basis. One of the guys is engaged, too :mamoru: It's hot. I thought I already told you this?
 

XPX

Active Member
Sep 14, 2002
12,037
Every party I come back from she asks if I found a girlfriend or not, the whole situation just feels awkward.

Last weekend I went to a wedding....boy that was awful the next day with the "all your friends are getting married, so when are you going to do it? do you have a gf? am I going to be a grandmother soon?" :ugh: :rofl:
 

dude101

Active Member
Jan 25, 2006
1,903
long island
this is what i did...grew some balls and just said it str8 forward..."mom im gay" worked for me :dunno:



but on that note: i was trashed
 

XPX

Active Member
Sep 14, 2002
12,037
You, too, can graduate to speaking with your straight guy friends like this :eek3:

We also grab each other's junk/butt and lick/bite each other on a regular basis. One of the guys is engaged, too :mamoru: It's hot. I thought I already told you this?


It is hot to me :o straight guys that play gay is just too much fun :o
 

Pen Is Mightier

you: hey dad, im a homo
dad: are you joking?
you: no


/thread
pretty much. no easy way around it. "i am gay" has to come out some time. might as well cut to the chase. there is no "easy way" to tell your father and mother you are a cock sucker to put it lightly.
 

Pen Is Mightier

:hs:

that's why i'm glad i have a brother who so far, is straight and enjoys the vagina. so far we're the only ones in my direct family to move to America so it is up to him to fuck like a rabbit I guess and get everyone else moved on over. :mamoru: none of my relatives know i'm gay yet. :(
 

blaq19

New Member
Dec 2, 2006
2,614
Bmore - Manhattan
Same proble with me Naturally Baked...my mom was like did prop 8 pass, i said yes and she said weird people shouldn't marry. she things she can predict the future/fate based on that chinese stuff what kinda girl i would marry etc etc...it would work if it were a guy haha...

if i tell her it will break her heart, as the only son in the family and the only oen who carries on the "family" name

my dad...god i donno what he would do..

Yeah, same here. My grandparents are so religious and self-centered in their own way of old school thinking with no open-mind. I always remember hearing about how this person is "funny" as they would call it and it was like they just thought so less of them. Which is why I haven't told my people either.
 

elevator

The tenants think it's wonderful! ヽ(´
OT Supporter
Mar 25, 2005
10,943
Houston, TX
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blaq19 said:
Same proble with me Naturally Baked...my mom was like did prop 8 pass, i said yes and she said weird people shouldn't marry. she things she can predict the future/fate based on that chinese stuff what kinda girl i would marry etc etc...it would work if it were a guy haha...

if i tell her it will break her heart, as the only son in the family and the only oen who carries on the "family" name

my dad...god i donno what he would do..

Yeah, same here. My grandparents are so religious and self-centered in their own way of old school thinking with no open-mind. I always remember hearing about how this person is "funny" as they would call it and it was like they just thought so less of them. Which is why I haven't told my people either.

I will never tell my grandmother... There is no point in upsetting her
 

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