SRS Had an extremely vivid/lucid dream the other night -- and woke up crying.

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
I dreamed that my father was still alive, but was failing and getting really sick. My wife and I were away when we got the call that dad was getting worse, but we were driving to see him. When we got to where he was, he was alone in a campground, and sitting in his wheelchair outside the camper, asleep, and the flies were biting him. I woke him up and made sure there were no flies on him, and started talking with him. He was speaking the same distant/confused way he spoke to me moments before he died right in front of me in the hospital.

I woke up crying uncontrollably, and even typing this, I'm tearing up. I was a wreck that night when I woke up, and I woke my wife up crying. Even the next day, I was still rattled by the dream.

It will be 3 years November 29th that he died, and not a single day goes by that I don't think about him.

I virtually NEVER have vivid dreams, have never had a lucid dream, and rarely ever remember my dreams. This one I can recall the entire dream from beginning to end.

Anyway, I really had to share this.
 

kingtoad

Well-Known Member
Sep 2, 2003
55,788
Los Angeles
I recently had a dream that my father fell off a building while trying to climb a ladder. While my father and I aren't exactly close, the thought of losing one of my parents tore me apart.

Sorry, broseph.
 

GFlem

New Member
Sep 13, 2004
19,531
Lakewood, OH
I dreamed that my father was still alive, but was failing and getting really sick. My wife and I were away when we got the call that dad was getting worse, but we were driving to see him. When we got to where he was, he was alone in a campground, and sitting in his wheelchair outside the camper, asleep, and the flies were biting him. I woke him up and made sure there were no flies on him, and started talking with him. He was speaking the same distant/confused way he spoke to me moments before he died right in front of me in the hospital.

I woke up crying uncontrollably, and even typing this, I'm tearing up. I was a wreck that night when I woke up, and I woke my wife up crying. Even the next day, I was still rattled by the dream.

It will be 3 years November 29th that he died, and not a single day goes by that I don't think about him.

I virtually NEVER have vivid dreams, have never had a lucid dream, and rarely ever remember my dreams. This one I can recall the entire dream from beginning to end.

Anyway, I really had to share this.

Had a dream like that a few months ago, but it was my wife that was passing away. It's fucking me up just thinking about it now.

She had been tied in a tree and we cut her down... the look she gave me right before she passed away, like she'd resigned herself to never seeing me again, but not quite believing that I was really there, and being grateful and sad and apologetic and scared at the same time.

Woke up at 3 in the morning and wasn't right for two days.

Should not have clicked into this thread.



Your brain is just telling you to remember who is important imho.
 

amze

New Member
Oct 1, 2007
10,669
Damn that's an intense one.

Lucid and vivid dreaming is something else. I've experienced some pretty indepth ones, where I have full control of myself, and can't leave the dream. But recognize I'm in one, and remember everything that's occuring. I enjoy it, if the scenario is pleasant.
 
TS
TS
The Green Bastard

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
Had a dream like that a few months ago, but it was my wife that was passing away. It's fucking me up just thinking about it now.

She had been tied in a tree and we cut her down... the look she gave me right before she passed away, like she'd resigned herself to never seeing me again, but not quite believing that I was really there, and being grateful and sad and apologetic and scared at the same time.

Woke up at 3 in the morning and wasn't right for two days.

Should not have clicked into this thread.



Your brain is just telling you to remember who is important imho.

My wife said it was my Dad saying 'Hello.' from beyond. That made me feel a bit better. :hs:
 

deusexaethera

OT Supporter
Jan 27, 2005
18,592
Death is always sudden. Even if getting to the point of death takes a long time, the actual moment of death itself is sudden, and sudden events are often traumatic. The fact that your father's vague, distracted mode of speech was significant enough to remember (and write about) means that was probably the moment of trauma for you -- the moment when you realized "oh no, he really is going to die right here in front of me." That moment fucks up everyone who sees it. Thus far I've been fortunate to have been "spared" seeing that final moment.

There's something very deeply "wrong" about death; it seems like it shouldn't be possible for something that's alive to just stop being alive, to become just another object like a stone or a fallen tree. That sense of "wrongness" is probably where people got the idea that the essence of a person leaves their body upon death, to go somewhere else as opposed to vanishing. Maybe that does happen, I dunno, but whatever spiritual process might be involved with death, the physical process is always upsetting to watch.

The grief will pass when your brain is done adjusting to a world without your father in it, and the pain of loss will fade, but it will never go away completely. I still have dreams about my dad's mom, and she died 17 years ago.
 

Darketernal

Watch: Aria The Origination =)
I think you haven't processed the death of your father, he meant much to you. But i am sure he doesn't want to see you in torment over his death. Instead of dying for your father, as i said in another thread ,start living for him, imagine if you would have died instead of your father, would you like to see your family in agony and tears for many many years over your death? Of course not!, so please try to live for your father, knowing he would be more at peace when his son is at peace.
 
TS
TS
The Green Bastard

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
I think you haven't processed the death of your father, he meant much to you. But i am sure he doesn't want to see you in torment over his death. Instead of dying for your father, as i said in another thread ,start living for him, imagine if you would have died instead of your father, would you like to see your family in agony and tears for many many years over your death? Of course not!, so please try to live for your father, knowing he would be more at peace when his son is at peace.

:cool: That's pretty strong. I do live for him, my mother says often that I am so much like him in mannerisms, things I say, etc. :) I really looked up to him my entire life.
 

liquidmind

New Member
Sep 30, 2011
31
I feel like it's really a big part of the collective consciousness. Whatever matter or material made up your dad still lingers - whether it be physically in that house from when he visited or imprinted in a memory in your brain. We are not simply a 3rd person object that goes away when we die. We are a collection of things - memories, imprints, etc. I agree with your wife here. It was also you wanting to be with him again.
 
TS
TS
The Green Bastard

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
i get that she's trying to cheer you up, she should try, but if you were dead and wanted to say hello from beyond, wouldnt it be better if it were a replay of a good time, not when youre dying?

Good point.

I'm not religious, and don't believe in the hell and heaven thing, but I do believe that departed spirits go somewhere.
 

Spiritus

Well-Known Member
Oct 15, 2002
19,323
Do you keep a dream diary? I have a folder on my computer with what must be at least 100 dreams typed out in detail just after I've had them.

I wake up right after I have the dream and when I'm doing evaluating it, I go over to my computer and type down every single detail I can remember.

Karl Jung got a great deal out of a dream he had written down 10-20 years earlier.

It is good because our memory can be unreliable. Those little details can have a lot of meaning later. It only takes like 2 mins to write out, why not?
 

deusexaethera

OT Supporter
Jan 27, 2005
18,592
:cool: That's pretty strong. I do live for him, my mother says often that I am so much like him in mannerisms, things I say, etc. :) I really looked up to him my entire life.
It would be better to live for you, not him, but to figure out how his influence has caused you to become the person you are, and to be glad for that influence.
 
TS
TS
The Green Bastard

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
Do you keep a dream diary? I have a folder on my computer with what must be at least 100 dreams typed out in detail just after I've had them.

I wake up right after I have the dream and when I'm doing evaluating it, I go over to my computer and type down every single detail I can remember.

Karl Jung got a great deal out of a dream he had written down 10-20 years earlier.

It is good because our memory can be unreliable. Those little details can have a lot of meaning later. It only takes like 2 mins to write out, why not?

I may remember 2-3 dreams a year. I often wonder if I dream at all most nights.
 

Spiritus

Well-Known Member
Oct 15, 2002
19,323
I may remember 2-3 dreams a year. I often wonder if I dream at all most nights.

I constantly try to redefine my approach for the fear of people not wanting to read my stuff because it is "spiritual crap" or "Spiritus's old stuff again".

So I want you to know that I am trying to make a special effort to get through to you to explain a real phenomena that is occurring, a real explanation as to why that happens.

It happens to me, sometimes I can go for months without dreaming.

Then I can remember a great deal of many different dreams every night for months.

Everyone dreams - always. If you go to sleep, you'll be going through those dream worlds.

Yet sometimes we remember our dreams and sometimes we do not.

Some reasons why this occurs:

1) The "consciousness" is awake or asleep.

The consciousness is that free element of perception that can ingest an impression and make sense of it.

2) Damage to the dream memory center or a lack of chemicals that make it easy to remember your dreams.

So there are two ways to solve these two possible problems.

The first is to do your best to awaken your consciousness in a way that is practical to you - make sure you are not living your life mechanically. Look at everything as if it is new, not the "same old, same old".

There is a valid reason for this, mainly the fact that if you take something for granted then your brain will not exert any extra energy into processing it.

So take the extra energy and effort towards consciously processing your environment.

Make a habit of it.

This becomes your way of acting, so you repeat it in your dreams.

You look around in your dreams and try to consciously process your environment.

Then you start remembering your dreams.

This has the added benefit of helping improve your memory in general, it helps you enjoy life more in general.

You also stop missing out on things. The other day I was standing in line and I realized that I was just kind of being a zombie and not taking life by the reigns. So I started paying attention and started consciously processing my environment and questioning where I was. And boom, I realized that there was a sign there offering this really great discount but it would have only been valid if I had mentioned what was on the sign. So I saved money.

So yeah - don't just zombie out, take life by the reigns and you will benefit thrice fold.

Secondly, in regards to the 2) I was talking about.

Doing things like staying up way too late and then crashing asleep, or eating poorly for a couple days, not getting enough vitamins and so forth can easily damage the memory center that is utilized to remember dreams.

That memory center could be in an analogous way as a very delicate tissue. It easily rips but can heal quickly. If it stays ripped then it will not be able to remember anything, and it can stay ripped depending on bad habits (never getting to bed until you are completely exhausted, etc).

So keep that in mind. If you live in a healthy way and respect the notion that your dream memory will be the first to go, then chances are very high that you will be able to at least remember something for your dreams.

It is a fact that honey, almonds and citrus juices can provide ALL the necessary ingredients for a healthy memory in general, including dream memory.

If you tend to drink a lot of citrus juice and eat those other foods, and you stick to that and the other instructions recommended, you are guaranteed to start remembering dreams.

It is impossible for this advice not to work, if you follow it in the right way. You absolutely will start remembering dreams, perhaps every single night.

It's always a worthwhile effort, as you have proven through your original post, dreams have a very powerful effect on people.

Best of luck.
 
TS
TS
The Green Bastard

The Green Bastard

Click click click bang
May 7, 2002
80,293
Sunnyvale, Nova Scotia
I think that the dream's vividness, in part, was caused by my worry about my mom. She's 73 and has to go for some pretty major surgery on her bladder, and a total hysterectomy. She's having complications from a surgery she had 38 years ago, and mom's not young any more, and smokes -- pretty sure she has emphysema, too, which throws a wrench into her recovery, and the surgery itself.
 

Spiritus

Well-Known Member
Oct 15, 2002
19,323
Yep, that's perfectly valid.

Just the other day I had a dream that my toad died.

To my knowledge, it hadn't died physically yet. It had died in my dream though.

So I went down to check on it and sure enough it was dead.

Prophecy? That's possible.

It seems more likely to me though that I had seen the toad and it did not seem right. Yes, it did not seem like it's usual self and it had been staying in one spot and not moving very much for about a week.

This had created a lot of subconscious worries that perhaps did not raise up onto a conscious level because I had not given much thought into calling a veterinarian. My thoughts on the matter that maybe it was just a little down or whatever.

So the mind can use dreams to play out subconscious desires.

The world of dreams is the world of desires.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

About Us

  • Please do not post anything that violates any Local, State, Federal or International Laws. Your privacy is protected. You have the right to be forgotten. Site funded by advertising, link monetization and member support.
OT v15.8.1 Copyright © 2000-2022 Offtopic.com
Served by fu.offtopic.com

Online statistics

Members online
345
Guests online
65
Total visitors
410

Forum statistics

Threads
369,575
Messages
16,896,205
Members
86,875
Latest member
Theodor