I'm just curious, although maybe this thread would be useful for the ladies here. This may seem obvious to the guys but I have seen girls making these mistakes a lot. Consider this a list of shit NOT to say. Here are some things that don't work, starting from obvious: "What's wrong with you?" This is probably what the guy is thinking anyway, or trying not to think. MORE shame, does not a boner make. "Are you a faggot?" "You don't think I'm hot!" = *PRESSURE* "You don't have to do this if you don't want to." This is just frustrating. I've had it happen and it wasn't that I didn't want to. It was just ... malfunctioning. "It's okay, it happens." Might be good for some guys. Personally I would find it somewhat humiliating. The best possible response for me personally would be no response. Just ignore it, do not give a shit, keep messing around, be cool, and see what happens.