LOVE How do you fight the urge to contact your EX?

Sure why not?

New Member
I've gone 2 weeks strong, even grew a beard to help. Shaved this morning since the beard was too much for me, and now I want to talk to her:rolleyes:

I know, I know I'm better off not doing it, and I am way better off with her out of my life since she hurt me so much. I just miss having that someone there to talk to I guess.

Someone help distract me, please.
 

CorpseStreet

New Member
Jun 10, 2008
9,345
Force yourself to remember every shitty thing she did to you and how it made you feel. Think about all the time you spent hurt because of her and how you deserve so much better. Orrrr, find a new girl to distract you.
 

Midgetized

Don't mess with Douche Cat
May 29, 2000
49,722
San Diego, CA
find someone else to talk to

and realize that if you talk to her then you've just showed her what a pussy you are. she hurts you and you still want to show her that you miss her by contacting her? why do you want to give her that satisfaction?
 

lamour

New Member
Dec 9, 2008
60
why do you wanna talk to her? what were the circumstances surrounding the break up?
 
TS
TS

Sure why not?

New Member
I hear OT's a great distraction.

Mario Kart is an even greater distraction

find someone else to talk to

and realize that if you talk to her then you've just showed her what a pussy you are. she hurts you and you still want to show her that you miss her by contacting her? why do you want to give her that satisfaction?

I haven't talked to her, I'm the one who cut off the contact. I don't want to giver her that satisfaction, she doesn't devserve shit from me.
I don't want to talk to her as much as I want someone to talk to with whom I have that kind of closeness.

why do you wanna talk to her? what were the circumstances surrounding the break up?

She came home at 3:30 am texting her new "guy friend" who had been a problem before. I moved out the next morning.

Why don't you try writing her a letter with all the stuff you are tempted to say to her? Then, when you are done, tear it up and throw it in the trash.

I've done this kind of thing to help reinforce my decision. It helps, but theres only so many times I can do it before it doesn't help as much. I guess I'm starting to move on from it.
 
TS
TS

Sure why not?

New Member
keep reminding yourself of this and you'll be fine

I have reminders of this all the time since I had to move back home once I moved out of "our" place. Luckily I got my name off the lease.

And yes, I have been going out with friends, going to bars, approaching women, talking to other women, ect to help move on. It just sucks going from complete comfort with a long term girlfriend to being distant with new women. I just miss the comfort of the relationship, not her.
 

Saicho

New Member
Feb 13, 2006
356
Seattle
I have reminders of this all the time since I had to move back home once I moved out of "our" place. Luckily I got my name off the lease.

And yes, I have been going out with friends, going to bars, approaching women, talking to other women, ect to help move on. It just sucks going from complete comfort with a long term girlfriend to being distant with new women. I just miss the comfort of the relationship, not her.

Hey, that's great! Just keep on looking and I'm sure you'll find someone. Most guys are not looking for commitment which can scare girls away so it looks like you're one step ahead already :)
 

Bruticus

half dead
OT Supporter
Apr 10, 2004
4,549
Melbourne
I just use logic. Remember the reason you broke up with her and that should be enough to ensure you don't contact her.
 

teep

New Member
Mar 7, 2006
4,595
i deleted my ex from my phone, aim, email, etc... although i realized pretty quick it was pointless cause i know all those things anyway.

like everyone said the key is to find a distraction. doesn't necessarily have to be another girl. pick up a new hobby, set a personal goal, play video games, do something. anything to fill the void as long as it's not self destructive.

personally, I work more hours than I used to and took a couple fights in the upcoming months. that leaves me with very little time to think about contacting her. I hit up the bar and party scene at first, but I quickly realized it just wasn't for me...not yet anyway.
 

lamour

New Member
Dec 9, 2008
60
look the point is its super heard. im with you it blows. you were in love your heart got smashed and now you have to pick up the pieces. you have to remember though that you have to move forwards and make a clean break in order to make progress and regain your self respect. she hurt you and dosent deserve you right now and contacting her will interrupt the healing process
 

Bcr821

New Member
Jun 17, 2004
38,199
Woodstock, Ga
I didn't contact my EX for a while because i knew she was crazy. I would have had no problem talking to her but i knew it was for her own good. Now we talk every now and then and she's cool
 

lamour

New Member
Dec 9, 2008
60
I delete them out of my life. Remove from FB, phone, IM all that shit.


although i wanna say this it childish behavior, i have to say :werd:

eventually it all calms down but at first if you dont cut off all communication it just drags it out and makes it more painful!
 

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