I would like to share some of my past experiences with you kind folks of this sub forum, and perhaps maybe some of you can get new ideas out of it. Or perhaps I'm just blogging like a dumbass and this will be a waste of time, but hey ya never know. I was a bouncer at a bar/club during college for 2 years. It was near a satellite campus of PSU, and in a "former coal mining" area. In other words, it brought together every walk of life in an environment that served up whores for guys to fight over and endless alcohol. Everyone from strong guys that did manual labor for a living to groups of mexicans came to this place. It was a bad mixing bowl. In those 2 years, I witnessed, broke up, and was involved in countless fights and confrontations. Some were with sober people, and others were with drunk people. During this time, there are some common sense tactics that ALWAYS work no matter who the person is. Stay Calm-Try to control the adrenaline When something bad is about to happen, you will start shaking. You will be scared and your body's natural defenses will kick in. This could end you quickly. That adrenaline allows your body to quickly burn up all energy, making you exhausted in a mere minute or two. I've been in it so many times and still have a hard time staying calm. Breathe slowly. Stay relaxed and use diplomacy to solve it. If you leave the confrontation with the aggressor thinking he made you look like a dick... awesome. Who gives a fuck? The winner is the one he is a bigger man and walks away. Broken noses and black eyes aren't attractive. Talk Slowly and Misdirect them Don't yell. It allows them to yell loud and try to top you. Talk slowly (also helps with staying relaxed) and work the problem. If you are a good liar like me, make up some bullshit that they can't possibly snap at. They are accusing you of cutting them off in traffic or staring at their girl? "Sorry I didn't even realize it. I have a family member that is suffering from a health problem and I'm just zoned out." Guess what? 99% of people are done, and stop right there. I have never seen anyone continue to snap out after some insane claim unless they are drunk out of their mind and just want to fight period. No one ever, ever, EVER stands toe to toe and boxes Get any image out of your head of a good ali-frazier fight or a scene from a movie. Fights are dirty and they last for about 2.8secs on your feet. You are going to the ground whether you want to or not, so you better go down with the upper hand. Don't go nuts and swing 80 times in an attempt to hit them. You will be exhausted right away. Protect yourself Your hands are your greatest friend in any situation. A lot of problems at a bar or in general public (road rage, etc) can be seen coming. They mostly start with a guy snapping out before he talks himself in to getting physical. Get your hands the fuck up for crying out loud. Don't cross your arms and don't put your hands in your pocket. I usually held my hands at chest level and just rubbed them together making an excuse to keep them near my face. When shit breaks he is going for your face, so keep those hands inches from protecting your face. Also, protect those nuts. Cheap fucks, especially if the guy is smaller, is going to knee/kick/punch/bite your nuts. Angle those hips and be prepared to get them out of the line of fire. Punching to the face = lawsuits So this asshole swung at you first and you busted up his face? Well, if you're both patrons at a bar and both drinking.... you are very well facing some charges/fines/medical bills for the guy. I prefer to choke the living fuck out of people. In all the confrontations I had as a bouncer, I only punched a guy once. It was stupid and I was insanely pissed off. I lost my cool. All the other cases were getting behind the person and locking them up. Unless they are professionally trained, they aren't doing a damn thing and are at your mercy. Close their throat and make them fear for their life. They will be instantly exhausted and in no mood to fight when you left them go. I always used my weak arm to wrap around their neck from behind. I put the center of their throat right around the joint of my arm, and then I used my strong arm to pull back on my weak arm wrist. It allows for a very tight hold and keeps your strong arm available to fight off his arm if he swings back. Also turn your hip slightly in to his back to protect the weak side from a blow. Situational Awareness Always keep your eyes moving. You may have the upper hand on the guy that started the fight, but there is no rule that says his midget buddy won't smash a bottle over your head from behind. Always stay alert. Don't hesitate either. If a guy is in the middle of pulling a bat out of his car or a knife out of his pocket, get on him before he has a chance to compose himself and make a strike. On more than one occasion, I grabbed bats/sticks out of peoples' hands before they had a chance to swing them. Run Forrest Run I'm a big guy, but even I can tear up the 100m in a sick amount of time when I'm scared and adrenaline is running like 2 containers of NOS in my system. Some situations are impossible to defend, like coming across a gang of people who want a piece. Hopefully you are close to public areas that you can get to. Shame and Ego I never really cared about looking like a "bitch" or any of that other shit in an argument. I'm 6'4 and 300lbs. Most guys are smaller than me, and it was always lose/lose for me. They are snapping out at me and clearly the aggressor, but if I kick their ass I look like the bad guy. Such a pain in the ass situation always, but hey if I can live with it so can everyone else. Living in the NOVA area, I frequently see road rages go on. People can flip the finger or snap out verbally all they want. I don't care. I stay relaxed and just laugh. If they need to snap out and vent to feel better, then ok go for it. I'm fine. I hope some of this makes sense or is helpful. Unfortunately the best experience is to actually be in situations to learn. Before bouncing I was so stupid in confrontations. It taught me how to handle and defuse bad situations. Now I am so calm in most things, that it takes absolutely crazy things to set me off. Ok I'm done.