This is awesome but im debating on wether or not to tell my S/O. Let me give a little backround info real quick. (long but read through) Before I had a wreck where I should have died I was about 160lbs and pretty well built. I was dominantin bed to make a long story short. Very confidant. Then after hospitalization and rehab im 130lbs and just starting to get muscle definition back. In the course of those two years a couple things happened. One, only live once don't hold back. That fed my new found very open mind. Then I meet alicia. Been with her for two years, were getting married and have the best open relationship. We hide nothing, she is my support shes fun, freaky (once she met me an my open mind rubbed off) and we love each other. Well I lost my confidence after the wreck and I was self concious. She helped me through that. We started trying different things and moved on to DP'ing here shes fucked me with a strap on video's all kinds of stuff. Then we started fishing. Well I did. She never believed I caught fish cause every time she goes I catch shit. So she started fishing and we started betting. Silly crap. Well one bet was she was gonna do my make up if she caught more fish or a bigger one and I would get to fuck her there at the pond if I won. I lost. We went home and she decked me out. It was humiliating but I was more turned on than anything. I didn't say anything, we wiped it off later and tha was that. Well I lost another bet and she gets to dress me like a chick. This is where I need advice. I've always had a fetish for feminine (sp) stuff. A chick in stockigs, certain make-up, certain clohing etc. Then when she started using a dildo on me, the submissive humiliating feelings went nuts. The sex is never better. The thought of her dressing me up, callingme a sissy, playing with me, just me being at her mercy drives me nuts. Me in her clothes just throws itover the top. I guess I like cross dressing. I think like alot of gay people will say they knew they were gay since a young age. I know im not gay, I have no attraction towards men, but from a young age things like make-up and sexy clothes turned me on. I've never been with someone enough to trust them and act on my feelings or even speak of them. With alicia though we try things and she has a pretty open mind. I just don't wanna hit her limit if there is one. Im pretty opening minded I think and so is she. Im not telling her im gay because in my heart I really don't think I am. Its the submissiveness and humiliation that turns me on. Im just affraid and feel humiliated almost trying to tell her, so im turned on. I want to tell her because we can both enjoy this. She was raised very traditional and only started opening up with me in the last year. I don't want her to pick up hints I like it without her knowing I do, she may revert to old ways and just prejudge. Everything I've wanted to do i've eased here into the idea and showed her all aspects of it and she accepted it. Another words if she just found me dressed up she would freak out and over react. But if I tell her and let her do it she'll be more open minded. I guess I answered my own question. I should tell her, but any advice how? All I can think to tell her in the mix of it is that this is only something I enjoyw ith her. And I do. Its her being there using me that does it, not running around like a chick alone. I've only felt these feelings with her.