I've never posted in here before and I only browse it sometimes so I dont know if this is where this needs to be. Its a bit of a read, but i'll try and keep it short. Last semester, I studied abroad in Italy with 32 other students from my university. In that time, I became really close with one girl in particualar. Everything clicked... but I knew that I didnt want to date her. When things started getting physical (thanks to a good bit of alcohol), I had to tell her that I enjoyed being with her, but that I didnt want to be a boyfriend for her. She cried, but we continued to progress in our non-relationship relationship. Over the course of the semester, I had to have a serious talk with her 3 times about not wanting to be a boyfriend. Things started getting really physical though, and I know that I was sending mixed signals the whole time. Everyday, I probably spent about 12 hours with her, easily. Wherever I was, she was... and I didnt completely hate that fact.... I really liked her... as a friend. Once we got back, we didnt get to see each other for 5 weeks. In that time, I tried to call her a couple times a week to try and keep in touch. Everytime I called though, it felt like she was getting further and further away. Once we came back for our spring semester, I sat down with her in class and she practically ignored me. She made it painfully obvious that she wanted nothing to do with me. And frankly, I was oddly fine with that. She ended up calling later that night to explain that she didnt want to hang out with me anymore. I told her that I was completely cool with that, and I dont think she was expecting that reaction. I had a great group of friends and some other female interests to keep me busy for the time being. Well, since she consumed so much of my time in Italy, I didnt really get to know everyone else on the trip as well as I should have. Now, I'm hanging out with them more and more... and I'm starting to realize how well I get along with them. One guy even went so far to tell someone else, "Phillip is so much cooler without [her]." Tired of reading? I'm almost done. Here's the problem. She's good friends with my friends too. And when social events occur, its almost like they have to choose which person they are going to hang out with that night; me or her. Well, one of my friends got tired of that, so she invited us both... and it was just akward the entire night. We never looked at each other the whole time and I dont think we were ever within 10 feet of each other. Our friends had to choose which of the two conversations they were going to participate in... and I hate that they had to do that. I ended up leaving much earlier than I wanted to (right now, actually.... who leaves a party at 11?). I know that eventually, we're going to have to talk about the situation. But I dont know how to handle this. On the one hand, I hate drama... I will go out of my way to end it. On the other hand, I feel like giving her the cold shoulder... after all, thats what she did to me. I know that if I do that though, its going to cause more drama in the group. Frankly, I could care less about her. Its my friends and the dynamics of the group that I'm trying to preserve. I know that I'm not going to address her about the situation. Its going to come from her end or not at all (and there is alot of pressure on her from my friends to talk to me about this). But when we do talk, I dont know if I should just make her feel like shit or let her get away with this. Another small detail I forgot earlier (Sorry), she is apparently talking shit about me to our friends, while whenever I'm asked about her, I politely say that 'we just dont hang out anymore.... and that I have no bad feelings towards her' (which is true). I feel that her saying some of the comments she has is petty and immature... which makes me not want to give her the time of day. I know this was long and maybe not all that clear. I just dont know how to handle the situation at the moment.