I honestly can't recall a time I've felt this down on myself before. a little background first...this is gonna be long so grab a beer and a snack: I'm 21, starting my 4th year attending a commuter college while still living at home with my parents. I didn't go away to school because my parents didn't make any financial plans for me, so I didn't want to put myself deep in debt if I could help it. also, after high school, I didn't think I was ready to be out on my own. my friends all moved away after high school and in the three full years I've attended this commuter school, I haven't made a single real friend. I'm pretty shy and keep to myself mostly....so that along with the fact that most commuter students just aren't as open to meeting new people like students on big campuses are has made it rough. during the school year I pretty much just go to class and work. no real social life. because the school is small, there are no real extracurricular activities that I can get involved in to meet new people. I've also never been in a relationship with a girl. never kissed, never had sex...absolutely nothing. although I'm asian, I know that girls have been attracted to me physically...I consider myself to be fairly attractive and I've had several females tell me the same. people are very surprised when they find out that I've never been in a relationship. I attribute it to the fact that I consider myself a very boring person with little personality. I'm nice, polite, NOT a doormat....I'm just not funny, nor can I hold a conversation very long. I'm boring. looking back, I've had a couple opportunities with females, but my shyness and insecurities have prevented me from making any sort of move. a while ago I posted a thread asking for advice about a first date. I met a co-worker one year ago who I thought was very physically attractive. she went away to finish her last year of college and recently came back to work this summer. she was going to take a year off before returning to start law school. we got along pretty well, so not too long ago I got the courage to ask her out. turns out she had been wanting me to ask her for quite some time. she actually gave me her number without me even having to ask. we set up a date, but unfortunately a family issue forced her to cancel (I know for a fact it was legitimate, it wasn't an excuse). right after, she left for a week to return to her old school. tonight she tells me that instead of taking a year off, she's changed plans and is going to work on becoming a teacher instead. so instead of staying here a year, she's going back to school in three weeks. I haven't got my date, and even if she asks me to take her out, I'll refuse. I'm not going to get anymore attached to someone, only to have them leave a couple weeks later. I shouldn't be down about this, but honestly I feel like total shit. like I said, I've never been in a relationship and for a while I began to think everything may be turning around for me. I'll get my first date, maybe my first kiss, and even my first g/f. instead I get nothing. I get my hopes up so high when an attractive female shows me even the slightest bit of attention (though I get plenty of interest from females I don't find attractive). I know this is wrong and it's pathetic and I want to change, but I can't. I don't know how to. I have a shit job, still live with my parents, have no friends nine months out of the year, am majoring in something I'm not sure I want to be in, and am lonlier than I've ever felt in my life. I know what some of you are going to say. "don't worry about finding the right person, work on improving yourself and things will come to you when you least expect them to." "force yourself into social situations and eventually your social skills will develop." I don't know where to start. I've been searching for a new job for quite some time, but there's nothing decent out there for a college student with no degree. shitty job + full time student = can't afford to move out of my parent's house. as far as the social side goes...I try to be open and conversational but I've gotten nowhere. going to a commute school doesn't help. I'm in my 4th year now, so it's almost pointless to transfer away. I finally get this opportunity with a girl and it gets torn away from me. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. why do I constantly get shafted? when am I going to catch my break? I need help. I'm seriously depressed and need help opening up socially. I wake up in the morning and force myself to get out of bed. it's hard to find any sort of motivation when you've got nothing in life to look forward to. do I approach my normal doctor inquiring about medication for depression and social anxiety?