I need some help ASAP! Link to Question/thread - Serious advice only

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Guz200sx, Sep 1, 2007.

  1. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    UPDATE 9/13 - I need some help ASAP! Link to Question/thread - Serious advice only

    http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=3393174

    Why is it so difficult for me to penetrate my girlfriends vagina??

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    I'm posting this here because I want SERIOUS replies and/or SERIOUS suggestions/advice only

    Even when I use lubrication and when we foreplay and oral sex, penetration is still difficult and after a couple of tries I get frustrated and lose my erection.

    We have also tried different positions such as her on top, me on top and also me from behind.

    At first, I thought it was me but I think its the design of her vagina..This may sound silly but I think my girlfriends vagina is too "tight"...its like the muscles inside her vagina are very strong and won't let my penis enter...She tells me she is relaxed and ready. Once during Oral Sex, she pleaded with me too stop because she was so ready to have sex and so we tried but again we could not.

    In retrospect, I've never had this problem with other female partners.

    If anyone has any suggestions on this please let me know. We have decided to try again tonite and If it doesn't work tonite then I don't know what we will do. We've already tried everything else and we are both ready to have vaginal intercourse.

    Thank You.

    Additional Details -

    Also I have to add that she said its never really been a problem for her either but with one other partner. she and an ex boyfriend tried three times until they were finally able to have vaginal intercourse.

    She also takes a long time to achieve orgasm. Once I spent an hour (i think) fingering her until she finally had an orgasm.
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2007
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    As someone said in the other thread....have her go to the doctor possibly about vaginismus.
     
  3. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    But she does not feel pain or discomfort from penetration. And she has had sex before but this is the first time this is happened to both of us.
     
  4. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Still should probably see a doctor. You can't really rule out medical causes until you get it checked out.
     
  5. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I highly doubt she has vaginismus...this is a condition where it's actually unbearable for a woman to even have anything enter her vagina, let alone a penis. To the point of breaking down and crying because of pain.

    I would advise her to talk to her gynocologist about this.

    Does she masturbate often and does she get off to it? i have not read the other thread so pardon me if it's been answered
     
  6. razi

    razi New Member

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    though it doesn't sound as bad as yours, I've been in a similar situation. you need to find whatever her keys are, psychologically. it sounds like she's nervous and not quite comfortable yet.

    that and go slow and gentle (at first at least). part of it might be that you just have to find the right angle- not just missionary vs. doggie, but literally the right angle of how you're moving into her.
     
  7. stormywaters

    stormywaters Tornadoes are just wind...

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    I has a lot of trouble with him entering me also. We have to be at just the right angle or it hurts me too much. I am very small and tight though so I know how frustrating it is. :hs:
     
  8. fray

    fray New Member

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    Is she very petite? Does she feel really tight when you finger her? Are you on the large side (penis-wise)?
     
  9. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Yes, she has masturbated and I have also used my fingers on her and brought her to climax.

    I tried using two fingers and she was very tight but because she was excited it was easy to use my fingers on her. As I fingered her, I noticed her bone :)confused:) on the top might be the problem. I know ... sounds weird ... I don't know how to exactly describe it either.



     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2007
  10. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    She is not petite. She does feel tight when I finger her and I'm not that big but I do believe I have some good girth to me.

     
  11. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Its been a while since we tried but I think she feels very comfortable with me now so we have discussed trying it again.
    We tried doggy in the past and it didn't work also but I was also frustated and not fully erect. I've heard angles might be the problem so we may try and figure out what works for us.

    Her friend has told her that maybe she gets frustated, after we try and it doesn't happen, and tenses up.

    I think this is true, for both of us, because I lose my erection if we try and we can't do it after trying twice.

     
  12. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    how far in are you getting? whats stopping you? pain, or it simply wont go in any further? is someone using a hand to spread the vagina open?
     
  13. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    The one time I got in, after trying for a while, it was only the tip of the penis. Then I pulled out cause it was really tight/hard and I started going limp.

    The only thing that has stopped is I can't get it in cause its too tight or I go limp because we keep trying and I get frustated.

    I don't think she's ever used her hands to spread open her vagina...I haven't either.

    She doesn't feel pain either. Since then I've used my fingers and its tight. Two fingers was really tight. I am thinking I could use my fingers, to get her really excited and then slide in somehow?? I think it would work better if I had a vibrator or dildo but I've asked her about it before and she kind of blew it off (or forgot about it) so I'm not asking her again about them.
     
  14. verdiocchi

    verdiocchi Oh snap!

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    Are you using condoms? Surprisingly this has been known to cause problems for some women. If you are, try to penetrate without one on just to see if it works. If so, you try a different brand/type of condom, something thinner perhaps. Random advice I know, but I've heard of this happening before.
     
  15. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    I must confess, the fact that shes not in any pain is really stumping me. Its a sensitive spot, whatever it is you are running into should hurt if you are pushing hard enough.

    use lube. your whole dick and her vagina, inside and out. spread for entry so you dont end up catching anything thats supposed to be out and trying to put it in.

    have her spread her legs as wide as she is able. get a pillow under her ass. legs up. either straight up, bent, whatever but make sure her pelvis is pointing up, instead of down like it will if you use a pillow and put her feet on the bed.
     
  16. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    After a lot of foreplay try rubbing the tip of your cock slowly around the lips and clit and maybe slide the tip in slightly. That feels sooooooo damn good and it should be easier to just slide it in after or put the condom on real quick and stick it in.
     
  17. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    have you ever tried teasing her for an extended period of time?
     
  18. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    :naughty:Damn that does sound good.

     
  19. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Whats an extended period of time? Longer than 15mins??

    I usually tease her for about 5-10mins before doing anything
     
  20. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    UPDATE on Girlfriend situation

    Well, after talking to her one night and suggesting dirty talk, she pretty much froze up on me and we began to discuss why and I found out her father was pretty abusive towards her and her mother. He used to get drunk and would yell at them and call them names. I don't believe he ever hit them but just did a lot of yelling and verbal abuse and possibly also throwing things. This left a scar on her emotionally.

    So talking dirty is really something she does not like to do. Also she said I have lowered a lot of her emotional barriers that she has put up when she was with other guys. But she still has some.....so the more and more I think about it, the more and more I begin to believe she may indeed have Vaginismus, which stems from her Psychological and Emotional experiences in the past.

    It took a lot for her to open up to me about her childhood experiences. It was very hard for her but she said she wanted me to know.

    Now I am wondering though...How do I bring this up about Vaginismus??? I do not think I can bring it up right away....especially after having that talk but maybe in a week or two.

    But how do I go about even talking about Vaginismus? She is going to obviously ask me how did I find out about this. I think it would be weird if I told her 'I went on a message board and asked strangers,'
    She would prolly be freaked out about it.
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    No, you tell her you were worried about how tight she was and went onto some medical site to look it up and it suggested vaginismus.
     
  22. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    Hmm, Yea.....I may try one more time. I think she is pretty comfortable. Well at least, she appears to be.

    She'll be coming over next weekend so we can try then again. Hopefully it can accomplished this time
     
  23. runawaycamel

    runawaycamel New Member

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    Do you know if she fingers herself alone? Sometimes the reason for her being so uncomfortable is not necessarily you, but because she is not aware enough about her own body. I have vaginismus, and doing this really helps.
     
  24. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    We were talking about masturbation the other day and she mentioned she has done it before....

    What would you recommend she do??

    The one thing that baffles me is girls with this generally feel pain and/or discomfort upon penetration and she has not stated she feels either one. And also the fact that she has had sex before....and never felt pain and/or discomfort.


     
  25. Guz200sx

    Guz200sx The man who does more than he is paid for will soo

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    an update to this thread -

    We actually attempted and had sex this past saturday in our first full on intercourse. She was very tight but I used lots of lube and I also positioned myself where I was off the bed and she was on the bed on her back and I just crounched down a little & leaned over and entered her in that position. The only problem was getting good traction on my feet cause I kept slipping. I also had socks on which is why I was slipping. Next time, I'll either lose the socks or have my slippers on, haha. Since she was so tight it took some time getting used to it but I was able to go on and achieve orgasm. It was pretty good but definately room for improvement.

    Now I'm just baffled why she is so tight...She's said she has had sex but I don't know. I've never had a girl be as tight as her. Its kind of funny but afterwards my dick hurt :rofl:

    But Hopefully, we can go again this weekend. :)
     

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