SRS I'm having panic attacks at work because of vindicitve co-worker

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by RX8Shinka, Jul 23, 2007.

  1. RX8Shinka

    RX8Shinka New Member

    Jun 4, 2005
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    I started working for this company (which shall remain nameless) over two years ago. This is more of a part-time, seasonal job.. not something I want to make a career out of.

    When I first started, I was a bit nervous and I've never quite snapped out of that funk. Maybe this is because I never felt like I fit in. Although my job was quite important, I did not receive an email account at this job and had to use my private one for client emaling. I confronted the woman who was training me at the time named "Judy" and she looked me me as if I was from Mars. She got really aggressive, started me in the eye and said "You don't need one. Is that a problem?" I should have said yes but I didn't. I was trying to maintain good relations here..

    As time goes on, I find out that she was dating a former instructor of mine. She would giggle and laugh with him. I later started noticing him staring at me more and more often, or doing something to get my attention. I ignored him. This guy said some sugggestive things to me in the past and has a police record. I haven't seen him in a while but I know that she still communicates with him. I went to a restaurant last year and he saw me there with a friend. He looked at me and then got right up in my friends face like he was about to punch him and walked away. I have no idea what is going on here..

    Last month, I walked in on Judy and our new CEO Sandra having a conversation. Sandra was very open and friendly. I really enjoyed meeting her. After that, I excused myself and went on about my work. When I returned, Sandra and Judy were gathering up their things and Sandra gave me the dirtest look, like I just killed her dog or something. It was clear that Judy said something about me, what that is I don't know. After that Sandra wasn't too friendly and kept her eye on me. It wasn't until just a few weeks ago when she spoke with my other co-workers and guests that she realized that I am a good worker. She's been fine to me ever since. She even complimented me..

    Now tomorrow I have to go work with Judy. I emailed her twice and she won't respond. I don't know how to deal with her. Everytime I see her, I get scared and start shaking or stumbling my words. She makes me feel like I don't belong there. In fact the last time, I stayed late for a meeting and she said really loud "What are you still doing here????!!!!!!!!" in front of another co-worker-- it was really embarassing.

    How do I handle this? Please help! :sadwavey:

    Oh and by the way, I've been chosen for Employee of the Month. What kinda joke is that?!
  2. mrchina

    mrchina Guest

    If it's not something/someplace you want to make a career out of, just find a new job during your time off and leave the place. It's obvious you don't feel comfortable there so why feel shitty at work when you really don't have to?
  3. kEVOgt350

    kEVOgt350 Like a flashlight on but lost, my energy's there b

    Mar 31, 2006
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    Torrance, CA
    seriously. just leave. it doesn't seem worth the agony. but if you must stay, don't let this judy character get to you. she's obviously feeding off of your fear and insecurity. you're getting all hysterical over things that shouldn't even matter to you. stop worrying about what she's telling people or what people think of you. it doesn't matter. any halfway descent human being would judge you themselves and not listen to what some obnoxious co-worker of yours tells them.
  4. Stilgar1973

    Stilgar1973 New Member

    Aug 12, 2006
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    I think in the end the easiest solution is to find a new job.

    Having said that, there are state laws that protect you from that sort of harassment. You know you DO have a right to work in a place free from that sort of harassment.


    Let me tell you my story.

    I worked nights for 7 years. I work in a 24/7 department. We have a skeleton crew of night people (5 people) and a larger crew of day people (8 people).

    The day and night people have NEVER gotten along. I could go into detail about why this is the case, but the bottom line is that they never have and they probably never will.

    When I worked nights I spent a lot of time worrying about why we didn't get along. I felt it could be fixed.
    I was wrong. What I hadn't considered is that there are people perfectly content not getting along. My view was that people would be happier if the dynamic improved. I was wrong.

    Eventually I gave up.

    Well it came back to me that the daytime people didn't like me. They didn't like me at all. I learned a bit about it and discovered that people didn't like me because I was getting blamed for things others did. It was all lies and bullshit.
    Like I said, some people WANT to live with trouble. They enjoy being negative.
    They were spreading lies and exagerating things about me because they wanted me at there level.

    So one day I got an opportunity to go daytime.
    I took it.
    One problem, all those people disliked me. Every one of them.

    Know what I did about it?

    I didn't worry about it at all. That is what I did.
    I showed up for work and treated them just like I have always treated everyone. I assumed that if I was honest with them that everything would work out - and it did.

    It took them a while, but eventually they started coming to me and they were like, 'Hey I thought you were an asshole? What gives?' I just tell them it was all lies and BS. That I knew what they thought and why they thought it, but I didn't fight it cause I felt it was better to resolve it by working with them then to start some sort of battle.

    There is my story. Probably won't help. I really think you need a new job.

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