SRS I'm joining you in abstaining from alcohol

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Rocky, Mar 30, 2012.

  1. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    I've been to AA, even went for treatment in outpatient in the past.

    I don't like doing either one, at all.

    A few months ago I finally did share at AA, it's just not for me.

    My last bout of drinking I have a lump and scratch on my head and have no idea how it got there.
    I didn't have any yesterday, and today. I'm doing ok so far, my nerves will be shot by the end of today. More than likely it would end up by my soothing it by imbibing.
    This bullshit has to stop.

    Drinking robs me of 2 days of my life, the day I do it and the next. Sometimes it has robbed me for most of a week and even month. It has robbed years from my life, honestly.

    I guess what I need is that anonymous support you guys can bring. I plan on telling you I made another day, and another, and another.
    FML.
     
  2. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    Well, only FML temporarily :h5:
    A lot of us go to NA cuz we didn't like AA. And actually, NA started buy dudes that didn't like AA either. Took the literature, took most of the holy goddy stuff out of it, and started NA. Have you ever tried NA?
     
  3. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    No, but am thinking about it.

    I went for a quick walk in the woods for an hour to work off this nervous energy.

    Not going out tonight either.
     
  4. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    Do yourself a favor and check it out
     
  5. more off

    more off Moderator

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    or even just check out different AA meetings. they arent all the same.
     
  6. D7

    D7 OT Supporter

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  7. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    I have done quite a few, all sporadically through the years.

    I've been touched by the fact of 10 strangers writing down their phone numbers on a pamphlet and to call them. I haven't reached out.

    A few months ago,I went on a few in a week by the prodding of one of the members, someone that really reached out to me. I'll call him Joe...
    I know where to find him and at what meetings.

    The fact is I haven't wanted to stop. I realize it's an entire life change. I have to find other things to do with my evening. For example I stayed in last night and played xbox. I found a game with mature people conversing ( a few of them drunk )

    With AA, I've been to 10's over the last 5 years, I know it hasn't been the 100's. I did find a couple of meetings that I'd go back to again.

    AA is for someone that wants to stop drinking, I haven't wanted to stop.
    This time I do, seriously.

    Thanks for this forum, it's making me stop and think a little bit.

    And yes, I'd love to run to the store right now.
     
  8. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    give yourself some credit, you've reached out quite a bit already, keep it up.
     
  9. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Saw family Sat, went on an all day hike with friends Sunday.

    I'm feeling ok right now, but am plotting my course to alcohol tomorrow.
    I'm going to have to distract myself from that.
     
  10. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    what worked before?
     
  11. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Change up my day, drive a different direction home even if it takes me 5 miles out of the way.

    I made an appointment to donate platelets this evening, can't drink today.
     
  12. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    sounds harder than going to a meeting
     
  13. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Last night, about 16 drinks.

    Light, but still bad. I was cruising.
     
  14. Adom

    Adom OT Supporter

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    most people can't do it by themselves.
     
  15. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Stopped at the watering hole, was asked where I've been. Only had a few.

    Stopped and got a 12 pack and went home.

    FML

    The anxiety was letting up a little too. :wtc:

    Going to a meeting tonight, where I know the guy I called Joe will be there.
     
  16. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    good job, sounds like you're coming to grips with where you stand on this issue.
     
  17. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Still going on. I didn't drink since Sunday night, I still got out on my MTB and did a trail in the evening even though I felt like shit.
    Doing so tonight as well when I'm finished.
     
  18. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    ouch man
     
  19. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    Well, I'm on day 3 again. Will let you know if I keep it up.
     
  20. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    You have to understand why you feel driven to drink in the first place. Right now it might be because you're a little nervous, but what was the very first reason why you picked up the drink? Examine the drama of your life around that time, it can be very telling. If you can comprehend the causes then your alcohol addiction will fall like a house of cards, as long as you can deeply comprehend those root forces at work within. Its not easy to see why, especially not for the alcoholic, they probably drink to avoid it. You'll probably cry bitter tears when you discover the real reason why you drink. That being said, I bet the meetings would help a lot with that process, of self discovery, to find the roots.
     
  21. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    My outpatient that I went to touched on that. I probably should call them and go to it again.
     
  22. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    get a phone list and use it.
     
  23. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    We need to become integral, resolute people. No one has willpower nowadays. People start dieting and working out for a couple days then stop. We say that we have to give up the drink then in a couple of days we are saying that we need a drink. We need definition.

    Resolute - Firm or determined; unwavering.

    Integral - Possessing everything essential; entire.

    When our thoughts, feelings and actions contradict each others we lose our individuality.

    Individuality - the state or quality of being an individual; a person separate from other persons and possessing his or her own needs or goals. Being self expressive, independent.

    We need to be undivided. Indivisible.

    To be undivided is a source of great pain. However, to be divided is a source of even greater pain, because it is the fruitless path. We need to establish our psychological center of gravity in the sober person, not the alcoholic. This is a conscious act of willpower.

     
  24. i killed tupac

    i killed tupac New Member

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    similar:

    I:

    I walk down the street.
    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
    I fall in.
    I am lost…
    I am helpless.
    It is not my fault.
    It takes forever to find my way out.

    II:
    I walk down the same street.
    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
    I pretend I don’t see it.
    I fall in.
    I can’t believe I am in the same place.
    But it isn’t my fault.
    It still takes a long time to get out.

    III:
    I walk down the same street.
    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
    I see it there.
    I still fall in…It’s a habit.
    My eyes are open.
    I know where I am.
    It is my fault.
    I get out immediately.

    IV:
    I walk down the same street.
    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
    I walk around it.

    V:
    I walk down another street.


    -Portia Nelson
     
  25. Rocky

    Rocky Shaddup! Shadnup! Button yer lip OT Supporter

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    I'm in it now. Tupac and Spiritus thanks.
    I have hit backspace a lot.
    This is coherent.
    I have to get over a hump, and when I do I will stop forever.
    Thanks again.
     

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