Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by redspydaman, Jul 11, 2005.
cuz...it's kicking my ass.
I heard it was the easiest
oh shit...if that's the case...I'm in trouble
No I heard it only gets harder, you're thinking about college/university
Of course that all depends on the amount of work both of you put into yourselves.
Well it really depends from couple to couple.
Did you live together before marriage?
Thats the big question right there. If you already lived together before marriage, and shared finances, then the initial parts of marriage should be no shock, and you should be living it up.
If you havent lived together and shared finances then marriage kinda throws you into all that really quick. If you arent prepared to give ALOT then you will fail. I know they always say you have to be willing to give up a few things here and there...well it can be more than a few, but if you are truly in love you will realize most are trivial. You shouldnt give up the things that are important to you, and your partner shouldnt want you 2 anyways.
Whats getting you about marriage thats making it during your first year?
probably depends on the situation
It's one of the hardest. It kicked my ass too. Things got really tough again sometime between year 12-14.
i think marriage in general is hard sometimes regardless of which year of it you are in. Time doesn't matter, if the issue is there it could come to attention at anytime.
For me and the wife, the first year was the hardest. Now after the third anniversary it's all good.
Nah, the first year is the hardest. That is when you are still getting used to each other. Marriage is hard in general, don't get me wrong. But the first year is definately the hardest IMO.
There's alot of things that you don't think about that will come up in the 1st year. Things will get easier. Especially if you really love eachother (which you should cause you got married...) you'll get through it. I saw my brother and sister in law do this same thing- and now i look at them and only hope my marriage one day is as good as theirs.
it's nothing serious. just the bickering about the little things. I think once the dust settles on the discovery phase and we smooth out all the differences and make the compromises we both need to make, it'll all be ok.
holy run-on sentence.....
LOVE the AV btw....
Single Guy here...
What makes it hard?
ever live with a female that you cant get away from (not that you would want to all the time, but she is always going to be there...that makes things different sometimes)
ever share all the bills with a female?
actually its not always just a female. Different people do different things at different times. Humans are being's of rutine. We like to do things in the same ways most of the time. Most of the time you dont even notice how many little things you do that other people really dont, but when you live intamently with someone else, you start to notice they dont do the same things as you...and that will throw off your routine. Its just something you need to get used to.
There are more things, and its never anything big, just tons and tons of little things. But while its hard, its also a whole lot of fun when you are just married and so in love. Thats why you need to make sure its love though, or it really wont work. Resentment can build up quick.
this post > *
thanks....my wife thanks you as well since they are hers
The first year of my marriage was the only one that worked at all
I agree that living together beforehand erases a whole lot of the uncomfortable moments, stupid fights, and general weirdness of the beginning of a marriage. Just knowing the person you're marrying really, really well does too. I think a lot of people get into the marriage before they're ready, and they pay for it with hard times. It doesn't mean your marriage is going to fail, it just means you've got some work to do.
Don't get stingy on us....
Any year marriage can be hell. Things can be going good and take a turn for the worst at any moment.
I personally will never marry any chick if we didnt live together for atleaste a year.
i have made it through two years almost. the thing that helps me the most is just to shut up. arguing about it(whatever IT may be) is usually pointless with women because they think with their heart instead of their brain.
after 15 minutes or so my wife always realizes she was wrong and we do whatever IT is my way. just shut up, don't egg them on.
Only 3 months?! You must've REALLY hit it off well....
And on the second part too
our first was very hard.
seeing as we came back from our honeymoon to $14k in damages to our condo that were not covered by insurance & that the assclown upstairs that caused them would not pay to fix
we spent 3 months living out of suitcases in hotels, trying to scrape by & get our condo fixed so we could live in it & then sell it.
her family had some problems that stressed her out & hence got us into more fights.
I thought I was going to lose my job..that stressed me out & we got into a lot fights because of it.
Money & bills have never been a problem for us. we share all the income & have no problems whatsoever.
Just remember why it was you got married in the first place.
You made a comitment. Now do everything you can to stick to it.
You will never last if you only share the load of things 50/50
always try to aim for what I call 60/60
if you both try to pull that extra 10% of the load you will find the going much eaiser. That goes for compromise as well. Don't try to meet her halfway...go a little further. That said she should do the same for you.
Remember it is you two VS. the world.
Look after your team mate, because if somthing happens to her, you are going to have a tough time at it alone.