I realize this now, after 10 months of treating my ex-gf like shit. No other girl will ever top this one, not by a million years. She was everything that a geeky guy like myself would want. She was a geek. The most gorgeous geek one can lay eyes on. One who had a heart of gold, who cared about me with such compassion, it was stuff made for fairy tales, literally. She was a fucking princess and the smartest person that I will ever come to know. And yet with all of these things, I ended up destroying her being and hurting her more than anyone else will. When I say that I treated her like shit, that is the understatement of the century. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know what drove me to treat her like shit. Even though I never physically abused her, I abused her emotionally which is far worse than me punching her or slapping her around. I don't know what made me yell at her and degrade her and made me do all these those horrible things. I threatened to leave her just to see if she loved me. Why the fuck was I this stupid? Why the fuck did I do all of this to her She never deserved any of this. Not a single second of the pain I inflicted upon her. She never should have met me, but now I have to live with the fact that I destroyed a precious diamond. I ruined her, and there is no one to blame but myself. I only write this because of I horrible I feel. I feel like a monster for having treated her in such a manner. I don't ask for any sympathy from anyone on this forum because I deserve nothing of the sort. I only needed a place to get these thoughts put down somewhere and maybe to serve as a warning to the guys of this server, to never treat your gf like I have. That if you sincerely love your gf, to treat her like a fucking queen. To treat her like one of those princesses from a disney movie. To treat her like she's the absolute most wonderful thing in the world. Maybe I learn my lesson, but I still have to live with what I have done. That's all.