First of all, my views and this thread are based on getting a lasting, healthy relationship. Know that I have no interest in pursuing people just for sex. I am more concerned with the difference between a personal/emotional relationship and a relationship for sex, and whether or not you can realize which you want, and which you are in. If you want to understand the intricacies of other peoples manipulation, read what Yail posts, he very eloquently tells you how to understand and respond to it. Many of the standard dating practices are just exercises in lying and manipulation. For many people, they just want sex, which is fine. But if you are looking for a real, lasting relationship, these lies, games and deception are a WASTE OF YOUR TIME. You don't find a good personal relationship by tricking someone into bed. You do it by first loving and being happy with yourself, being happy single, and then getting to know others and knowing what you want in a partner, and finding it. It takes a long time to do, but being yourself and expecting the same of others is the ONLY way to find a really good relationship. Lying to each other throughout a long-term relationship is terribly poisonous, and everyone seems to do this without realizing it, because they are trying to get laid, not get in a real relationship. Sex to me is not that important, and what is MUCH more important to me is the relationship between me and my partner, which is based around our personalities. I am absolutely not going to do lie about who I am, as it would attract people who don't like me. What I will do is be myself, all day, every day. I get to know people, I make friendships, and if I find someone I consider compatible I'll pursue a sexual relationship with them, but it's based on personality, not sexual attraction. Why is this? Again, I don't care enough about sex to sacrifice my dignity and lie to people. But, there's another, more important reason. You don't establish a good relationship on lies. Whenever two people establish a relationship lying to each other, and then later in the relationship (Especially after marriage) their true selves comes out, the relationship is damaged, often permanently. In case you're wondering, these are all lying: Consciously Lying to your spouse Omitting things about yourself because you think they might hurt the relationship Subconsciously changing yourself into someone that doesn't enjoy life as much to make your spouse more happy (Good example of this is the story about the couple who each sold their hair to buy the other a comb, both sacrificed things they didn't need to and in the end neither sacrifice led to anything positive in their relationship, but the sacrifices hurt each other individually) People change who they are in a relationship, to 'make the relationship healthier.' What you are doing is poisoning it. While yes, in the short-term, the relationship will last longer, but really what you're doing is permanently damaging your relationship at a personal/emotional level to get more sex. At the stage where you have been hiding things about yourself long-term, you have one of two options- Stop lying to your partner and watch the relationship most likely collapse, or change yourself permanently. Tell me, are either of those signs of a healthy relationship? No. Bottom line- Lying about who you are, manipulating people, and just the stupid, bullshit relationship games in general lead to BAD relationships, that WILL NOT last long-term. If you just want sex, make that clear, fuckbuddy relationships are fine, perfectly natural and almost accepted in this day and age. However, if you want a meaningful, long-term partner, you CAN NOT lie about who you are. I don't lie for sex, I don't lie period. I'm who I am, all the time. I want my spouse to love me for the same reasons I love myself, and I want a spouse with the same outlook. Will this happen soon? No. But when it does, I'll have a much better shot at a meaningful relationship, based entirely on compatible personalities, and a very, very strong base to build a long-term relationship around. Problems can and should be worked out. Until that day, I'm fine being single, and I don't really care what other people have to say about it, because dating just to date, or dating just for sex is a waste of time. Don't try to be in a relationship, it happens if it happens, be happy with yourself first. You may have to be that way for a very long period of time, but that's all the better, because you can never know for sure whether or not something is going to work out, and if you can always fall back on yourself it's the best position to be in. And when you DO get in a relationship, be selective for fucks sake. You deserve someone who is right for you. They say relationships are all about Honesty and Communication. They are right. This post is just explaining where the roots of honesty and deception come from.