I am not sure if I have been in some kind of time warp but about 5 months before my 20th anniverisity, I realize that I am really really unhappy. I am married to a man, which this is his second marriage. I know that in the last 20 years he has had a couple of encounters. That is fine since most of the time with our 3 children, full time work and pretty much full time school, I don't have time or desire to even want to worry about wifely duties. But about 5-6 months ago, I started to notice all the critisism that I have been receiving, he never really touches me, definetly never kisses me passionately, which i tried a few times to initiate and received the cold shoulder. I have sat back for the last 5 months and whatched him and i really don't like what i see. I am really sitting back and wondering, if this is what i want for the rest of my life. I lived with a mentally abusive father and watching him he is pretty borderline. I have told him I am unhappy and he seems to try more but even the thought of him touching me makes me cringe. I can't sleep with him, even the smell of him makes my nose wrinkle. You would think that once telling him something like that he would try really hard or even try to make things better and he sits back in front of the tv. he tries lovey dovey stuff when the kids are around but if it is just us, we are miles apart. I truely think that he is interested in someone else, which again is fine. I have a younger friend that I talk to not about this but about everything else, and am getting very strong feelings for because he makes me smile all the time and laugh0. My husband knows about him and doesn't say anything except a few comments here and there. He has asked me if we are okay. I have told him I am not happy and that i am not sure. he tried to be nice for a couple of days then back to the nit picky comments that seem to go on forever. Kids are out of highschool in 4 years and then i just want to go away. Anyone else out there been through this? Or at least some thoughts?