SRS My Grandpa was an alcoholic

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by LudaMan, Jul 5, 2005.

  1. LudaMan

    LudaMan Active Member

    Sep 29, 2004
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    West Des Moines, IA
    When i was a freshman in high school (about six years ago), my grandpa on my dads side passed away. It was a sad time, everyone did the standard operating procedure of mourning for him, and after a while, they just stopped talking about him. Compared to my other family, my dads was very "proper" and i never really felt welcome there except by my aunt maggie, but thats another story.

    Anyway, i did a little research of my own on my grandpa, mainly by casually asking relatives and looking through old photo albums and such. Grandpa had never felt much like a grandpa to me because he was always intimidating and would have these anger spurts that got so bad that my mom wouldnt let my sister and me be in the room with him without someone else there. When i was a kid, they did a good job of hiding their skeletons, so everything seemed close to normal for me.

    To make a long story not quite as long, i found out that my grandpa was an alcoholic. My mom felt it was time to explain it to me, which makes sense now, because when i was a kid, he would always have a drink in his hand, but when youre a kid, you tend to not pay as much attention to those things. I feel a bunch of different emotions now, some good, but most bad. It explained his anger problems, and why he would always be alone by himself when we had family gatherings. Im not one for bullshitting people or holding things back, so when i thought back to all the cute funny little stories people shared at his funeral, it kind of bothered me that they were hiding who he really was.

    I dont know why im typing this, no one can help me, especially not my dads family, because they refuse to bring it up. I guess it just feels good to get it out to someone else. I guess what im trying to ask is: has anyone else encountered something similar to this before?
  2. KarmaPolice

    KarmaPolice Active Member

    Oct 28, 2004
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    Gilbert, AZ
    i found out that most of my dad's side of the family has battled alcoholism at some point in their lifes... nothing hardcore like your grandfather's sounded... but they have always been a bit too casual about drinking, and tended to get slap happy more than they should...

    it was weird cause i never really realized it until my aunt was telling me about it one day... since then, things have clicked a little more, and though i'm not sure if i believe it's hereditary (like some studies suggest)... i know that all in all it has made me a lot more concious of it and more respectful of alcohol myself...

    yeah, it's tough to find out someone you love is addicted to anything... but at the same time, if you see them overcome it it brings that much more pride and respect for them in my mind... and if you see they have the issue, you can better understand, and help them... i know i went out and read a TON about it after i found out about my family's past... so maybe you should do the same...

    the knowledge will bring you comfort...

    and don't rely on that highschool/college/middleschool sex/drugs ed bullshit... read the hard facts and SOME well thought out opinions...
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Oct 8, 2002
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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    I fortunatly can relate , my moms side of the family everyone is cozy,happy and makes you feel welcome and much more , It's darkness my grandpa used to drink jenever a lot (according to my mother) but my great grandfather, was (according to my dad) quite a drinker too. It 'apparently' seems that misery tends to be passed to the next generation. When you have a drinker, you might as wel have a horse in your house. The damage is strangly enough inheritable , as the bad behaviour and bad athmosphere is effecting everyone in the form of darkness,hatred and agression. Skeletons in the closeth is a good definition, and you being angry and dissapointed is the result of the

    wave effect that this darkness and unhappynes is also has been projected upon your soul. Everyone gets negativly effected by your Grandpa's addiction. People who have to carry the weight of a family member being a alcholic have a absolutely dreadfull (understatement) horrible thing to bear with a person like that amongst themselves. I can only hope that this stimulates you to NEVER go the same path as your grandpa, i also advice you to love your grandpa, and be a loving and helping person in order to deflect the negative effects that have been casted down on you, second thumbs up for your mom who tried to shelter you from this misery, and it hopefully also

    is a source for you to understand and accept why the rest of your dads family seems to be such a black hole, simply put they became like that due to the darkness and bitter atmosphere that your grandpa effectivly projected on your dads family members, who as a result all became 'afflicted'. Only a lot of constructive love can start to bring and glue back the pieces that where broken.

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