So, I guess I should start from the beginning. About 3 months ago, I found out that I was preggers, I freaked out. Even though I love children, I just didn't plan on having any for a very long time, since I had planned on being financially stable before I even thought of having children. I told my fiance, and he freaked out, and we both said that we were not ready to have children. Well, I personally couldn't opt for an abortion, so we started talking about adoption... Well, John (my fiance) started looking into a career in the Air Force. After a couple weeks he decided that he was going to join the Air Force. Although I don't necessarily believe in what the military is doing right now, I still strongly support the troops. Also, I really think this will be a great learning experience for John. He has never really had any discipline in his life and has a hard time keeping a job. Which was the one thing that was still keeping me a little distanced from him, because no matter how much I loved him, I couldn't marry him if he can't even take care of himself. So, I was so proud of him for wanting to join the military, so that he could have a stable job, get some experience, and start making a living for his family. With him deciding to join the military, we decided to keep the kiddo... and I am starting to get really excited about that, I know that I will be a great parent. Well, the Air Force said that we had to get married before he could join, since we had a child on the way. So, we got married. It was much earlier than expected, but it was going to happen eventually anyway. For the last month I have been trying to prepare myself that he was going to leave anyday and I really thought I would be okay. But now, since Monday, he's been gone. It's not like we haven't been apart before, it's just the fact that we will have no contact. Well, there are still letters... but I'd at least like to hear his voice every once in a while. So, I have been super depressed and anti-social and I don't know what to do about it, I'm not normally the chick that gets depressed. To top it all off, I have so much stuff to deal with over the next 8 weeks that I am not going to have any help with at all. It just makes me even more depressed. I hate being a grown up.