T*U: It's an absolute honor to speak with you, Rampage. Rampage: Aww, thanks homie. T*U: How you feeling after your last fight? (Against Keith Jardine) Rampage: I'm feeling like a big load of dry donkey dookie...nah, I'm kidding. I'm feeling really good man. I'm happy to not be in a gym, to not be training. I'm on top of the world. My body needs a break, and that's what I'm doing, giving my body what it needs. T*U: Were you a little surprised when Dana came up to you right after the fight and told you they wanted you to fight again in May against Rashad Evans? Rampage: That blew me away, I was like "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" That was like my worst nightmare. It was the worst thing that could happen after a fight. I almost just collapsed and passed out right there, you know what I'm saying? T*U: What was worse, having Dana tell you that news or getting hit in the crotch right after by Tiki? Rampage: I think Dana's news was worse, because my crotch was already numb from having Jardine put his foot up my rear. T*U: We know training in England has been really good for you, but do you actually like it? Or do you see it as a necessary evil? Rampage: To be honest, I kinda hate it and I kinda like it, you know what I'm saying? The people out there are really cool and really great. My teammates out there are really cool. Fun to train with. The gym itself is colder than it is outside. But they push you real hard, like if you want to let up, they ain't letting ya. They'll get up in your face. I knock someone out in sparring, they get right up "Alright, I'm alright, let's go let's go." You knock a guy out here, they're done. You do it out there, they come back trying to knock you out. Crazy sparring out there, I love it. T*U: How's the food out there? Rampage: The crazy thing is that the food so different from ours. I'm just not used to eating it. T*U: We see you hanging out with Tiki all the time. Do you enjoy spending that much time with him, or is it time to cut the cord? Rampage: Shut the hell up! Tiki's my homeboy, just like the t-shirt said homie. If it wasn't for Tiki, I wouldn't have done as well as I have in my last few fights. He tapes my hands up, spars with me, gives me gameplans, just makes sure I'm doing the right stuff. And, he keeps me out of trouble. He's always been my homeboy like that. T*U: A lot of people don't realize how talented and skilled Tiki really is. Rampage: People don't understand, I don't even think Tiki understands how talented he is. He's my worst enemy when I spar, and I guarantee he could kick anyone's behind that's out there. It's just up to Tiki to want to get out there and do it. A lot of times thats how it is with people...they just don't know what they got. T*U: So, Machida is facing Rashad, and you get the winner. Anyone in particular you looking forward to fighting? Obviously, Rashad got in your face, so you can't be too happy with that. Rampage: You know what, it don't matter. But you know I wanna get into that black on black crime. He come get in my face, trying to take my glory. For real though, his breath smelled like he lost a fight with a bull's booty. He got all up in my face, and I was like, "Damn, smell like he been eating poop jerky." T*U: You've already been big time, but now we see you on TMZ at clubs, pretty sure we saw you on the Tyra Banks show... Rampage: Man, if I was on the Tyra Banks show, I'd be trying to get a better shot of that damn forehead! Haha...man, TMZ, if they think you anybody, they put you up on their site. You know, I kinda wish my private life could just be my private life. But then TMZ catch me coming out a club, getting my lawyer in an uproar...I ain't driving drunk homie! T*U: How's it feel to be part of the Triumph United team? How's the equipment treating ya? Rampage: You know, me and Hans are working on some things. It's good to be back and working with some good people. A lot of the times, people don't understand how sponsors take advantage of these guys. The owner of Triumph United always hooked me up with the right people to work with, and now Triumph has the best gear on the planet. Hands down. Someone try to tell me it ain't the best, I'mma smack 'em. You got this other gear out here you can buy at Big 5 sporting goods, you take it home and it ain't got no laces. You're like, "What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" But this is the best stuff, it makes me want to train. You hit stuff and you're like BAM! T*U: What can fans expect from you for the rest of 2009? We gonna see you in Midnight Meat Train part 2? Rampage: I don't know about Midnight Meat Train pt 2. Me and John Cena been talking, he said he's got a real funny movie that he has me in mind for the lead role. Right now, when I got the time off, I'm gonna be working with an acting coach. I'm also gonna be working hard, I'm gonna start hitting the weights for real in the gym! I gotta get right! Get my jaw all healed up, start doing jaw pushups. So next time Sick Dog (Hector Ramirez) hits me with an uppercut with my mouth open, it's gonna hurt his fist. T*U: So wait, are you and John Cena gonna remake Lethal Weapon? Are you gonna be Danny Glover? Rampage: Yeah, I'm gonna be Danny Glover, talking like this: (Rampage proceeds to do the best and worst Danny Glover impression of all time.) T*U: Was Danny Glover there with you, because that was perfect. Rampage: Nah, he just took off. You missed him.