So this is it. My girlfriend will probably be on a reality show living in LA with a bunch of other dumb broads who will be doing stupid shit like wearing bikinis in fake pools of blood and wrestling in it, all for the end goal of being the final member left and winning some lead role in a movie... ...you all know the story about her leaving without a minute's notice to NYC to pursue her dream of acting. Well, it's been hard for me to deal with as I've let my shit go at school, and I'm still struggling to catch up. Well, she hasn't seriously dedicated herself to acting classes or getting involved. Everything she's done in NYC has been a result of her looks. Standing in hollister as a "floor model," trying to get commercial modeling jobs, etc. Well, I'm worried about her vanity. She has this huge bubble, thinks she's the hottest shit in the world (she is). But the way she talks about herself sometimes scares me. I know men and women alike drool over her. I'm worried though that since her acting is not up to par, and this is a reality show, that they just want her image for a ratings boost. Unfortunately, for as grown up as she is and the shit she's been through, she's extremely naive. She's a very sexual creature too, concerned really with looks and beauty, though at heart she's an amazing girl. Still, her choice to drop out of school, etc. to do this kind of has me worried. She's in a skin selling business, she's now going to be an image. I'm afraid that despite her reassurance and the comfortable levels we have established, she ultimately will end up fucking up big time. She's been nothing but loyal and faithful, and I haven't necessarily made this easier on her. But once I even begin to mention how producers will take advantage of anyone for ratings she takes it so personally as if I'm insinuating she'll do anything. But that's it. Producers will ask her how comfortable she is with doing something. And her, being in this new position, I feel will be obligated to answer yes to things she necessarily isn't. I can't stand the thought of her selling her self out or spreading herself thin based only on her looks. I'm seeing it all fall into place in my head. Her living in NYC for 4 weeks before moving right out to LA to be on some fucking reality show. She would have let this relationship go if she didn't want it the way she does (forever type of thing), but I feel that her naivety just hasn't caught up with her yet. She has no experience in the industry and she's a happy little girl who puts herself out there. I'm afraid it will be too late when she realizes she fucked up and got walked around on (as she had previously in her life). I love her with all of my heart, and I know she loves me too, especially for being the one. But it kills me inside to see how shallow her life and outlook seems to be on the outside. I forsee her getting mixed up in shit that isn't okay. I'm not comfortable with her making out with girls on a reality show or going out with a bunch of girls to bars in LA to meet a bunch of scumbags. I'm just wondering if I should save myself emotional fucking trouble (something I've only managed to overcome recently to the point where I can eat and study a little bit again, but my emotional devastation as a result of her loss was unhealthily cripping) and just tell her that we should separate, that way she doesn't feel tied down to something she got herself involved with in a previous life. I feel like I should let her go so she can comfortably lez out with the girls she'll be living with and be able to participate in the promiscuous lifestyle of reality tv queens, especially in LA. I just don't see this being a good recipe for a LDR, much less a relationship where we are together physically. Should I ride it out and see how it goes, worrying about stupid little shit, or just seriously consider letting it go in a mature manner, ultimately for the best of us? I don't know what to do, but I know I expect the person I'm with to maintain some code of integrity. There's more to everything than superficial surfaces, and though my girl recognizes it, it's like she's spending her time chasing after something hollow and fake. Why can't she get involved with the off-broadway acting circuit if she wants to be an actress instead of some stupid fucking reality shit where she'll do anything for a rating? I dunno, her lack of direction scares me. What do I do?