ok guys, i have been with this one girl a while now (2+ years) she has tons of great qualities... pretty, smart, fun, easy-going, puts up with my shit, gives me my freedom, and is a genuinely good person she is however very shy, even with me, and has tons of trouble expressing herself. this means that i always lead in the relationship on all levels, which, while it is my job, gets tiring. for ex, she doenst initiate sex other than dropping a very small hint. and while i sound like a total chick for saying this, once in a while i want her to go out of her way and take charge with a conversation/sex/a date/whatever on no level do i doubt how much she loves me or her intentions but the lack of expression gets on my nerves. i know you can't change people, but in this situation i believe that all the right things are there but she simply doesnt act on them. in other words, i don't want her to change, i want her to grow/mature. even more explicitly, i want to know that this is a path she wants to grow in and something she wants to work on, because i don't want her doing it just for me. i've tried everything i can think of involving patience and subtle (and less subtle) hints, and its getting to the point where i see no other alternative than to sit down and say she doesn't meet all the criteria i need but she so easily could if she worked at it and wanted to suggestions on how to do this/how to present this/etc? your thoughts?