Sup OT,
Long time lurker that needs to reach out for some advice. I feel for everyone on the forum that has gone though life's many challenges. Guess it's my turn for this year.
I have a half-brother that is 10 years younger than me. He's lived with my Mom and Step-Dad this whole time. I moved out and got married when he was still in high school. The kid seemed OK and had a good job after his graduation, but fell into the wrong crowd and got addicted to opiates. Oxy and Heroin as far as I know. My parents have spent the better part of the last 12-15 years trying to get him sober and nothing has worked. It's now to the point that he can't work and keeps getting denied Disability Benefits. So now he does nothing all day and has no income. There's no reasoning with him, everything said to him he takes as an attack and will yell back at you. I have pretty much ceased all communication with him.
Fast forward to June 2020, my Step-Dad died unexpectedly from a heart attack and now it's just my brother and my 72 year old Mom from the Philippines, who was not educated and solely relied on my Dad for everything. We bonded for a few weeks over the loss, but my brother fell back into his old ways of being agitated and angry. He fights with my Mom constantly and it's gotten to the point to where's she staying with my Aunt now to get away from him. She is getting by on her Social Security, but my Dad left her in crippling debt. No will, probate, nothing. He opened dozens of credit cards in her name that she was not aware of. This was all discovered when I went through all their paperwork the following day. I had to empty my savings to bury my Step-Dad and provide some cash to my Mom until she was able to get her higher Social Security payment. I also have to deal with the stack of collection letters for her and send debt forgiveness letters to hopefully avoid bankruptcy.
So now my Mom's house in in forbearance, we're trying to extend it to June 2021. We've stopped paying for the car and will let that get repossessed since it won't transfer into my Mom's name. Her plan is to go home to the Philippines to retire and stay with family there. She offered to take my brother, but he's so whacked out that he doesn't believe that they are losing the house. We got into a big fight about this a couple weeks ago and we ended up getting him arrested and sent to a mental hospital. We hoped he would stay for awhile, but he was released after 3 days. He came back energized and happy. Said he met some people he could relate to and we thought he turned the corner. Nope, one week later, he's back to being, angry, agitated, and irritable. I'm not sure what meds he's on now aside from Addreall, but they are narcotics as well. He's at the point where if he's not on his meds, he sleeps for 18 hours a day. When he is on his meds, he's always agitated and irritable. My Mom has essentially given up and is leaving next year with or without him. As much as I am apathetic towards him now for his past behavior and actions, I still want to provide him some options on where to stay. He's pretty much estranged from our immediate family, and I absolutely refuse to take him in because of the things he's said and done to my wife and our family. Plus we have young children in the house and i don't want them exposed to that.
Does anyone have any experience with this? Are there any permanent housing options for people with drug addiction or mental health issues? He's on Medicaid if that helps. I just want to give him some options before I let the house go into foreclosure or a short sale. Thanks for your time.
TL;DR Drug addicted brother that has no income and is estranged from his family may be homeless by June 2021. Our Mom is leaving everything behind and going to the Philippines. Looking for some options for him.
Update: Sent him an email explaining what's happening with the house and finances since none of us can talk to him and his reply was, "Ok, I'll disappear, leave me alone." Hope he keeps his word.
Long time lurker that needs to reach out for some advice. I feel for everyone on the forum that has gone though life's many challenges. Guess it's my turn for this year.
I have a half-brother that is 10 years younger than me. He's lived with my Mom and Step-Dad this whole time. I moved out and got married when he was still in high school. The kid seemed OK and had a good job after his graduation, but fell into the wrong crowd and got addicted to opiates. Oxy and Heroin as far as I know. My parents have spent the better part of the last 12-15 years trying to get him sober and nothing has worked. It's now to the point that he can't work and keeps getting denied Disability Benefits. So now he does nothing all day and has no income. There's no reasoning with him, everything said to him he takes as an attack and will yell back at you. I have pretty much ceased all communication with him.
Fast forward to June 2020, my Step-Dad died unexpectedly from a heart attack and now it's just my brother and my 72 year old Mom from the Philippines, who was not educated and solely relied on my Dad for everything. We bonded for a few weeks over the loss, but my brother fell back into his old ways of being agitated and angry. He fights with my Mom constantly and it's gotten to the point to where's she staying with my Aunt now to get away from him. She is getting by on her Social Security, but my Dad left her in crippling debt. No will, probate, nothing. He opened dozens of credit cards in her name that she was not aware of. This was all discovered when I went through all their paperwork the following day. I had to empty my savings to bury my Step-Dad and provide some cash to my Mom until she was able to get her higher Social Security payment. I also have to deal with the stack of collection letters for her and send debt forgiveness letters to hopefully avoid bankruptcy.
So now my Mom's house in in forbearance, we're trying to extend it to June 2021. We've stopped paying for the car and will let that get repossessed since it won't transfer into my Mom's name. Her plan is to go home to the Philippines to retire and stay with family there. She offered to take my brother, but he's so whacked out that he doesn't believe that they are losing the house. We got into a big fight about this a couple weeks ago and we ended up getting him arrested and sent to a mental hospital. We hoped he would stay for awhile, but he was released after 3 days. He came back energized and happy. Said he met some people he could relate to and we thought he turned the corner. Nope, one week later, he's back to being, angry, agitated, and irritable. I'm not sure what meds he's on now aside from Addreall, but they are narcotics as well. He's at the point where if he's not on his meds, he sleeps for 18 hours a day. When he is on his meds, he's always agitated and irritable. My Mom has essentially given up and is leaving next year with or without him. As much as I am apathetic towards him now for his past behavior and actions, I still want to provide him some options on where to stay. He's pretty much estranged from our immediate family, and I absolutely refuse to take him in because of the things he's said and done to my wife and our family. Plus we have young children in the house and i don't want them exposed to that.
Does anyone have any experience with this? Are there any permanent housing options for people with drug addiction or mental health issues? He's on Medicaid if that helps. I just want to give him some options before I let the house go into foreclosure or a short sale. Thanks for your time.
TL;DR Drug addicted brother that has no income and is estranged from his family may be homeless by June 2021. Our Mom is leaving everything behind and going to the Philippines. Looking for some options for him.
Update: Sent him an email explaining what's happening with the house and finances since none of us can talk to him and his reply was, "Ok, I'll disappear, leave me alone." Hope he keeps his word.
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