This was about two or three weeks ago... fuck dates, my memory is terrible for details. Every year I visit my friend at his university around this time. Now I had not gotten drunk in months, so I decided that my annual visit would be the perfect chance to remedy that with a lot of beers. I was not going to do any gaming or any shit like that - just have a fun time and be uninhibited. As people who know me here are aware, I see social interactions in a certain way. Like the way people behave appears to me as this flow of subconscious goals, facilitated by a bunch of little mechanisms they use to get where they want to go. Normally, I am concerned about my own little mechanisms and how I can get what I want from an interaction. But this was a fun night out, so none of that. Or so I thought. By the time I got drunk, I was still seeing the social fabric in that way that I do (can't do anything about it), but for some reason my drunk ass felt the urge to comment. Like everything I saw, I had to speak. I was sitting on a couch with two girls (not attractive) and just trying to be friendly and start a conversation. They were not interested so I sat back. I was not offended or anything because I was just kind of buzzing from the alcohol. Then I noticed something. "There's sexual tension between you two girls," I found myself saying... out loud. It was true. There was. "No there isn't!" said one of the girls. "Trust me," she said a little nervously, which was as bullshit as it sounds. Trust me?? lol. Someone else must have pointed the same thing out. Anyways I noticed what she was doing (in my own way) and of course found myself saying it out loud. "Ok," I said. "By saying that there is no sexual tension, you create a barrier between the two of you, against which the sexual tension will increase until it reaches a breaking point." Like part of me is a little embarrassed that I said all this shit but also it was really a little satisfying. Then they left the room. Probably to go fuck. lol. So after this conversation I was sitting on the couch again. And then I look over at a table with two girls and a guy. I drift to their table and sit down a little bit dramatically and eye them for a moment, making the girl to my right giggle. I ask the guy, "How long have you known these two girls?" "We just met two hours ago," he says awkwardly. "Yeah," I said. "Yeah cause you are really invested in learning more about these two." I pointed to the girls without looking at them... then I noticed something else, about the girl to my right, and my mouth opened again. "And," I continued, "I am too socially awkward to capitalize on the mild attraction that this girl here has towards me." I smiled. The girl across the table covered her mouth with her hand. The girl next to me blushed a little. Then I said, "Proving my point, I'm going to leave now." Ironically, saying all of this shit actually made me more attractive to them because they perceived it as some variety of confidence/savvy. Oh well. Another weird day in the life of j.