SRS Terrible dreams.

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Pwen, Jan 12, 2009.

  1. Pwen

    Pwen Guest

    My biggest problem is terrible dreams. I have dreams that push the limits of my fear to the breaking point. There are a few that reoccur, they are never the same but most are similar.

    I'll give a few examples.

    Demon dreams:

    One dream deals with me walking through my house like any other day but then the proportions of the house all change. The walls twist and I loose my balance and usually someone has to wake me up to stop the screaming, or moaning, because it's hard for me to form sounds or to speak at all when I'm that terrified. I consider the dreams that deal with me trying to form words in order to alert someone to come and save me as the same. They all came from dreams where I encounter a demon, demons, the undead etc. I have encountered many different looking demons and they are all really fucking scary and trying to kill me. They employ different tactics to scare me like the proportion thing or blood or tenticles or whatever.

    Violent dreams:

    I have been plagued with violent dreams for the past six years or so. All kinds of violence perpetrated against all kinds of people in all age groups (including family members). When I first started getting them I would write it off as a crazy dream but after six years of murder and death I think there might be more to it. It's hard for me to tell the difference between what is real and what isn't nowadays. It got to the point where I was sleepwalking, or so I'm told. My old room mate told me I came at him with a hammer and tried to hit him. I have no recollection of this but he has no reason to lie so I quit my job and got the hell out of town in an attempt to escape. It sucks waking up and wondering if I hurt anyone.

    Rape dreams:

    The rape dreams go hand and hand with the violent dreams. Long story short, I kill people who rape me.

    I have a bit of a psych record and spent some time locked up in a real asylum but that was for depression and self destructive behavior when I was 12-15. I spent a lot of my developing life locked up and heavily medicated. I have 2 friends and have never had a girlfriend.

    It may be hard for you to understand what it has been like and what kinds of coping mechanisms I have employed to deal with this. The first and most important coping mechanism I developed was the lack of compassion for a persons pain. I fell very little for other people, say when someone breaks their leg and the bone is sticking out, or a car accident or the death of someone I know-these things don't bother anymore and I think they should.

    I'd like to point out that I'm not a psycho. I don't enjoy hurting people and I'm not a killer. I don't know where these ideas come from or why I have these dreams. But they seem to be getting worse and if not worse than they are not going away.
  2. 2500

    2500 Guest

    Do you sleep near any sort of herbs or essential oils? I know many herbs or herb candles, bath soaps, incents, etc can sometimes cause some lucid weird dreams.

    Do you watch much TV or movies before bed?

    Have you ever done anything, harmful to someone else? You don't need to confess here or anything, but, sometimes guilt will haunt us in our dreams. And it will form in both ways, us harming someone, or someone harming us. It'll be the guilt of us harming them, or our subconcious harming us in return for the suffering we've caused others.

    Are you on any medications?

    Do you ever recognize anyone in these dreams?

    Do you have self esteem issues? I see the rape dream as, reflecting either an event or fear, that someone has or could, harm you/let you down and, it's showing a powerlessness about it, to where maybe you feel you cannot do anything about it, and, in your dream, you are killing the person because you feel you don't have the ability/courage/strength to overcome an emotional/physical blow. Perhaps you feel stress of life, financially, and, your boss is a hateful person, who you feel your life is controlled by and, you are scared he will fire you and you won't be able to provide for your family or something, and, you feel powerless or humiliated against a, bully in a sense.

    Do you ever feel taken advantage of?

    How old are you?

    Just some random questions to help myself and others understand a little more about your situation.

    Just to ease your mind, the dreams are prolly terrifying, but, I believe the MEANING of a dream is the important part, the deep meaning. A dream about murder, I believe, is about ending something, stopping something horrible, denfending something. Rape I see as a deeper meaning of how someone feels after they've been raped. What I'm saying is don't worry about WHAT you're dreaming, focus on the emotion under the dream. You're not a rapist, or a murderer in the making, or crazy.

    I've studied dreams and am normally pretty good at dream meanings, so I look forward to hearing back from you.
  3. Pwen

    Pwen Guest

    No. No herbs or anything like that.


    No. Nothing too bad, I've beat people up before and said mean stuff but nothing more that anyone else I've known.

    No. Although in the past I have been on Lithium, Paxil, Prozac, Zoloft, Haldol, Zyprexa (most recently) and a few others I can't remember.

    I always know the people.

    I would not say I have self esteem issues. I am outside almost everyday talking to and meeting people. I don't have a problem talking to women or strangers and my self image is pretty strong.

    Yes, I feel powerless when it comes to sex. Sex brings up negative thoughts for me and I can tell you why. It's simple, I have lived my entire life without love or sex or physical contact. I have a strong family but have never had a connection with a girl.

    When the rape dreams started the scenario would be of a person in power controlling what was going on and me lying there unable to move. Eventually I gained the control of my body and ruined their day to the best of my ability.

    Sex in general has become almost an unreality for me, like it's something that I have been imagining. I guess I lack the social skills required for sex and since I lack these skills I resort to (in dreams) what I know how to do, which is stabbing the fuck out of someone or causing pain.

    Not so much taken advantage of as not appreciated. I have taken steps in my life to prevent people from taking advantage of me. As far as people realizing that I am a person of worth and a force to be reckoned with, as far as that goes, it doesn't happen. I feel like I am surrounded by people who are essentially know-nothings (because they are) but see themselves as superior to me because, let's say, they have a girlfriend (who cheats on them anyways).


    I think the meaning of these dreams are a reflection as to how I see the world. I see other people living and doing the things I want to do, when I meet these people I am usually put off by their stupidity. I wonder to myself "how and why are these stupid people so happy, what do they have, how do they make it work, why do they not appreciate a person like me" etc. So, I guess in the dreams these people come around and it's all I can do to show them how I feel.

    Another point, since I have gained the ability to move and punish these dream people I have done just that. Now, I think, it's more of a standard, or a point that I'm trying to drill into them, they keep coming around and I keep killing them. I guess I'm telling them that I have put up with their game for too long and if they want to play that game I'll end it for them. I must be trying to tell society to change.
  4. 2500

    2500 Guest

    Thats interesting, because the feelings you have about sex, are actually very closely related to dreams of rape. I actually did some searching around, and, like I said before, and now that you've confirmed, a dream about rape, from my findings is infact thought to be related to fears/anxieties/being inexperienced/abused/inferior/unable - about sex. The murdering or harming of the person, I'd believe, to be you overcoming, either conciously, or subconciously, the concious feelings you have about sex. Is this something you dwell on, or, something that you find distracting you from life, or something you believe is holding you back from certain things?

    Another question I had was, who are the people in your dream? If they are always different, you don't need to start typing like 500 people, but, do you notice the same people in each dream, or is it random, but people you know?

    How long have you been off the meds?

    (And I asked about the herbs because my BF and I bought this little pouch from an earthy witchy type store, and it is called a dream pouch, and ever since we got it, we have both been having weird ass dreams.)
  5. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

    Apr 24, 2005
    Likes Received:
    at your mom's house. be back later.
    I have violent dreams almost every night :dunno: I have for as long as I can remember. They suck but I'm used to them. I just forget about them and go on with my day. Not much you can do about something you can't control :dunno:
  6. Scootin

    Scootin OT Supporter

    Sep 4, 2004
    Likes Received:
    St Louis
    I wouldn't get too caught up in interpretation of dreams. They are at best a representation of your mood, played out as "anxious" dreams, "angry" dreams, or whatever. Most dreams people have focus on anxiety and fear - like 70%. At worst dreams mean absolutely nothing.

    We tend to see nightmare symptoms in certain populations - most notably PTSD, but also anxious and depressed patients. The tendency to have these dreams goes through the roof since your REM propensity skyrockets in depression and your daily anxiety is much higher than normal.

    As of today, there's really no "good" way to get rid of nightmares, just like there's no "good" way to make you stop thinking about a specific thing. The best thing you can do is get into some cognitive behavioral therapy and/or drug therapy and work on your problems. Short-term, a benzodiazepine like Klonopin taken before bed can help reduce the incidence of nightmares and help control anxiety.
  7. D-FENS

    D-FENS New Member

    Nov 13, 2002
    Likes Received:
    I have violent dreams pretty often, but the vast majority of the time I'm killing terrorists, invading communists, muggers, etc, so I've never been too bothered by it.

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

    Jun 22, 2007
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    Have you or someone you cared about ever been sexually abused or violated -- especially you?
  9. Pwen

    Pwen Guest

    It's not something I dwell on, but when I wake up sometimes I have to check myself. The dreams are not holding me back from anything but I wonder sometimes where they come from.

    My dreams are mostly the smae, smae type of setting and circumstance, like a house that is haunted at night time, or a dungeon. These places contain the beast and I enter with random people from my life and things get like a horror flick but it's fun because I can experiance it as myself and watch what happens. The demons can be impressive. The people in these dreams are people I have known and that I've liked in life.

    The death and rape dreams are more strange because they are always of someone invading my space and pissing me off. I feel that the only reason people deal with me at all is to borrow or steal something, the way I see it people have made very little effort to do good to me, so fuck people (most people), and when it comes to women, they don't show motivation to fuck me (at least not ones that I'm attracted to) and I don't feel too much like hanging out with them and hearing about some other dude or some other randon bullshit like drapes or the middle east or some shit, one day I might find a girl who intersts me and fall in live with her personality:rolleyes:. That got old long ago.

    The people in the violent dreams are people who I don't trust or someone who represents something I don't like. I could name people by name but that would be pointless. Over the years there have been repeat offenders.

    I quit when they released me from the lockup. I was 15.
  10. 2500

    2500 Guest

    Makes me feel you've been fucked over by people who you trusted and liked, which I believe could be rooted in your brain and, even if conciously you don't feel this stuff, in your dreams, it coming through. Hypnosis could be very helpful in uprooting these feelings and ending your horrible dreams.

    You say "I feel that the only reason people deal with me at all is to borrow or steal something" yet, I asked if you felt taken advantage of, and you said not really. I believe you have a fear of being taken advantage of, and, I think thats where these feelings and dreams are coming from.

    So, in the demon dreams, the people you recognize you like in life, but the people in the violent and rape dreams are people you dislike, or do you not recognize them, or are they also people you like?

    Are the people in your dreams from your past, present or mixed?

    Do you notice any trends with the people in your 3 dream categories and your real life? Meaning, are, people who you like in demon dreams, and people who have fucked you over in the rape dreams, or, anything along those lines? Or, does it seem more random?

    OK, If I had to take a shot in the dark, and give my opinion as to why you're having dreams like this, heres what I think.

    I think you have self esteem issues, either concious or subconcious, possibly rooted in a poor upbringing, and I believe you have trust issues with people, and, it wouldn't surprise me if you had been significantly let down or used by someone you thought highly of in your past. I think, although this doesn't seem to effect you in life, I believe your subconcious is always on the look out for people you know harming you. It doesn't sound like you give people very much credit, and by saying you think people are out to use and steal from you, I think you have a hard time letting people close to you. Subconciously, I think a possible poor childhood, either with an emotionally/physically abusive parent, or with, "out of the norm" characteristics about yourself causing stress and emotional pain from other children, like, being over weight, or having alot of acne, or a deformity, or any number of things, I believe that has caused part of you to dislike people on a very low level. I think at that point, wether it was a parent or relative, or close friend, I think someone had let you down, lost your trust, stolen from you, hurt you, embarassed you, and I believe at a younger age, you developed a safe wall, and one hell of a scanning feature. I believe you constantly scan people, anylize their actions and motives, and, I believe you're always preparing yourself for someone you trust fucking you over. The demon dream, could just be a horrifying glimpse into YOUR subconcious, not that your possesed, but, a more, symbolic way of showing your inner "demons." Maybe your subconcious can't get through to you because your mind has been so trained in the "on gaurd" mind set, that, your "demons" are truly coming out in your dreams. Your violent dreams I believe are your subconcious mind fighting your "demons." It sounds like, death, which almost always means a new begining in dreams, is trying to get you out of this mindset. Death in dreams, in my research, means the end of something. It almost never means actual physical death. To me, weddings mean physical death. (more on that later). The rape dreams, I believe are just another way of portraying the invasive, embarassing, and unapproval feeling you get from others who "over power" you mentally when you find they're stealing, hurting you, or doing whatever other untrustworthy thing that you could be concerned about. All in all, I see very distinct connections to your life, your past, and your present in your dreams. I don't believe there is anything more serious at work here, but, I'm not a doctor, so I can't say there isn't something else going on inside your head. I will say, that I believe seeing a hypnotist, an actual alternate healer/hypnotherapist, not a stage hypnotist would be extremely beneficial to your situation.

    Now, about the wedding dreams.... My family is plagued with predicting death. My grandma has been doing it for years. She'll dream of a wedding, and someone in her nursing home dies. She'll call my mom every time it happens.

    Back in 2005, I woke up and went downstairs. My parents were in the kitchen, and my mom said "Me and your dad both had a dream about a wedding and we saw grandpa at the wedding. He was the only one we recognized." Not kidding, an hour later, we got a phone call my grandpa died. Why a wedding means death, we have never come up with a good connection, but, it happens in my family. Both my parents and grandparents have had wedding dreams come true.
  11. Pwen

    Pwen Guest

    Taking advantage of other people is a big part of life. I'm not sure you understand my viewpoint on "taking advantage of", I don't like the phrase but I'll try to use it.

    I think you have to take advantage of people to advance in any kind of relationship. Say you want to ask a girl on a date, you have to go up to her and ask her right? You have to "take advantage of" her because in my experience a girl who is in any way hot needs to be coddled and does not jump into my lap. Jesus, how nice would it be if a hot girl wanted to take advantage of me, if that happened I would not be here talking to you. I would be somewhere getting taken advantage of.


    I always recognize the people. The people in my rape/death dreams are always people I know and in some cases I have grown to dislike people due to nothing other than my dreaming about them. My parents have both "fallen" due to unacceptable behavior in my dreams and I have a hard time trusting anything around their house, like the food, especially milk.

    Mixed. Some of the people I have never met, like movie stars.

    People I like are in the demon dreams.

    People who have fucked me over are in the rape dreams, and people who I do not trust.

    I think they have a lot to do with being a capable person and wanting, for most of my life, to be "cool" and have friends and such but these things never panned out for me. I have never been part of anything with anyone and I have never really accomplished anthing of any consequence. People do not seek me out.

    I think after so long of people oraganizing in the same way and the feeling of scorn that came from them cutting me out (or whatever reason I was not involved) lead to a hatetred of their organization. Does that make sense? I think my mind percived the people in the dreams as believing that they were letting me in and that I should be happy to get any pennance at all, which pissed me off because I learned to live outside their "organization".

  12. 2500

    2500 Guest

    Yeah man, all your life stories are making your dreams make perfect sense to me. My best advice is to see a hypnotherapist. I'm certain they can really clear this stuff up. Lemme know if you have any other questions.
  13. 7960

    7960 New Member

    Oct 17, 2004
    Likes Received:
    New England
    My brother has these kinds of dreams when he eats MSG. I thought he was full of shit and (I swear it was an accident) I forgot to order "no MSG" when getting chinese. I always say no MSG but forgot this time....and didn't tell him.

    The next day his wife called and she told me he had MSG. Apparently he has these violent, gory, shoot-em-up war dreams and thrashes around in his sleep like he's getting shot or beat up.

    cliffs: it could be something in your diet.

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