To talk or not to talk? that is the question

So im already back in full swing out here in denver. I started to date Em and we have talked about stuff but we are not exclusive. So this weekend i got some play from this other girl i met. we did NOT sleep T/G. Should i let Em know about this or is it not worth talking about as we are not exclusive.

 

what does "talked about stuff" translate to?

 

we talked about where things are going so to speak. but we are both slow to want to get into to a full relationship with titles and all that.

 

where are you at on cuddling and expressing your feelings and all that?

 

If you've both talked about it not being a fully exclusive relationship, then I would say you're not obligated to tell her anything you don't want to. That is assuming you've had a conversation explicitly about the relationship being non-exclusive. Chances are if she agreed with being non exclusive but still dating, she might be seeing other people as well.

 

there is cuddling and stuff. expressing feelings we are at the I like you and you like me phase. We have both had long hard relationships before so we are both slow to open up. kinda

 

She's not going to like hearing it if you tell her.

That being said, what REASON do you have TO tell her, if any?

 

if you are not exclusive and you have discussed having the relationship open, then you probably dont need to tell her

do you feel like you want to?

 

i dont think i should. i think i wont say anything and i wont ask her anything

 

I think this is a good idea. You haven't made any obligations to one another.

 

true i just need to keep from falling back into my pattern of random girls every weekend. I just need to keep it in my pants.

 

why? you are a young man in his prime

 

Good. Don't ask, don't tell is about the only way an open relationship works.

Yail's right. If you still got the urge, you shouldn't deny yourself. The reason I say that is you want to get all that shit out of you before you settle down...that way you're not wondering what the grass is like on the other side all the time.

 

You're so smart, Viper. OP absolutely needs to listen to you!

 

I know what the grass is like on the other side. to quote Drag on "i get boy band kind of ass" As to say i can sit and whore it up still or i can keep it in my pants fuck just one girl (she is a 3x a day girl) She is the first girl i have like enough to even think about dating seriously in 2 years. And i have been told you always wonder if the grass is greener but you just love the person your with enough to not find out.

 

completely agreed.

 

Ok, then you need to shift your focus and change your lifestyle a bit then.

If you want to settle down with one girl, it's probably not an extremely wise idea to go to the bars every weekend. That's probably a trigger for wanting to "let it out of your pants".

Try getting into some new stuff. I'm not saying to stop going to bars (hell I don't even know if you GO to bars, but I'm just using it as an example of your stomping grounds), I'm just saying that perhaps you oughtta change your social scene just a tad to make the shift.