well here i am again, just wanted to get some stuff out there and maybe some of the folks here can give me a lil bit of insight on things. Basically it took me about 5 months to get to the point where i'd even consider being out with another girl in any kind of situation, I had re-connected with some old friends of mine who i had walked away from when i got in deep with my then GF (BTW the Ex's Name is Holly, just so no one gets confused here). Around the end of November , me and a few of my old friends decided to hang out and have a few beers , was supposed to be a fun night, and way to get away from all the shit for a lil while. Was me, my boy Josh , and the girl i had re-connected with, Lindsay , and her Best Friend Cheri. So we all went to a Bar , hung out , had a few drinks. Lindsay was as always all over me, but that isnt going anywhere , and i have tried to make it clear to her that its not gonna happen. Cheri is a cool chick , and we seem to have some sort of spark between us. At some point going to a Strip Club comes up, and both the girls were totally up for it. My Boy Josh wasnt feelin it as it just didnt have the money (neither did I , but i just went with it) . So me and the 2 girls end up at a strip club. Cheri ends up buyin me a beer , and a lapdance.. we all had a kick ass night , and decide to go for a drive , so the girls could sober up before their drive home. Everyone is horny as hell in the car. and i end up gettin a handjob from lindsay , while Cheri is sitting behind me gettin herself off.. again not something normal, but i just went with the flow and let it happen. So over the next few weeks, me and Cheri decide we did have some "spark" there , and i decide to drive up and see her , about 90 mins from where i live, we have a good time together, get along really well , and again hung out with her friend Lindsay , but we were hiding what we were doing from her as to not hurt her feelings. That night we hooked up , and again a few more times the next day. ( a lil FYI on cheri , she is 22 , im 28 , she lives on her own , has a good job and seems to know what she wants out of life) After that weekend , the Ex-GF holly was up my ass about where i was and who i was with , as i had just caught her lying to me once again and she was trying to turn it back on me , but begging me for rent money ( i finally caved and threw her 200 bucks for it). So on my drive back from Cheri's place , me and the Ex Holly talk on the phone , and she tells me she still has feelings for me , and wants to give it one more shot , which i decide to agree to. I guess just due to wanting to know if it could really ever work, and just wanted that closure. Over the next few weeks in December , me and the Ex Holly realy dont hang out , but talk on the phone all the time , and as is seen in some other thread , i got her kids xmas gifts , because she once again fucked up and didnt save any money for it. the Ex Blows me off on Christmas eve and day,though we both had said we'd make time for each other , and we barely speak at all , she just telling me how busy she is , even though she was at her aunts house , which is about a 1 minute drive from my house. again showing me that she wasnt putting anything at all into trying to re-kindle it. Over the weekend after christmas , i end up driving to see Cheri again , and we again have an awsome time. get along really well , and went to Lindsays b-day party. and again me and Cheri hook up , we just seem to get along really well , but by this point the Ex Holly is calling me when im with Cheri and just trying to generally be a pain in my ass. Cheri takes me to Lunch as a X-mas gift , and gets me a tank of gas also for X-mas , and we cruise around and walk along the beach in New Hampshire. Myself and Cheri also decided to level with our mutual friend Lindsay about what is going on, if she asked and let her know that we are sleeping together, because we didnt want to lie to her about it anymore. Lindsay was pretty upset by this , and has since not talked to either of us in a bit over a week. But it was the right thing to do , and not lie to somone that we both consider a friend. So again , through the week , Holly's rent is due , and she has none of it saved as usual , and is begging me for money, but i just finally gave up on helping her and didnt give her any money ( not that i had any to give). she yells at me , and gives me the guilt trip , about how now she will have nowhere to live , and needs to sleep in her car.. etc etc.. and all that. It bothers me, but in reality there is nothing at all i can do about it.. and she has to be independant and survive on her own. She ends up getting a 2nd job delivering pizza's at night . Over this weekend, Cheri Decides to come down and visit me , and we as always have a great time together.. i Intro'd her to my parents , and we all went out to dinner, then Cheri and Myself went out and did our thing. and spent some nice time together. Throughout the Night Holly is blowing up both my cell phones ( i have a personal , and work that i have to carry) and must call me 50 times.. just giving me a really hard time , because im not there for her or whatever.. tells me today she was scared and alone, as she lost or forgot her keys somewhere , and had to sleep in her car last night. at that point i had just turned my phones off , because i didnt want to be bothered anymore. Today i tried to tell Holly that i do , and always will love her.. because she was my 1st true love , and we have so much history together. but in reality she cant expect me to sit home every weekend, and wait for her. she isnt my girl anymore , and i want to have my life back. She has had every chance to get back with me and fix the problems , and every time she hasnt put anything into it at all. im done with fighting for something , that im the only one working for . Cheri is an awsome girl. knows how to make me happy.. and even just the small stuff definitely gives of herself and tries to go out of her way to do nice things for me , and our relationship is progressing well. I dont know if the Distance is gonna be an issue or not, its a lot of driving to see each other.. but we always seem to make it worth it. She works a lot of hours, but again she has her own place.. no kids , and just does everything she can to better herself. we did have a lil drama , when she didnt know what she wanted to do , and didnt want to hurt her best friend Lindsay ( who always wanted me , but it wasnt a mutual thing) but she worked it through , and decided to pursue this with me . so yea that was a lil ( though pretty long) lil update on whats going on with me , since my multiple posts about my ex GF.. Cliffs : met new girl , hook up with her. EX GF is still a pain in my ass wants me back but puts nothing into it. new girl makes effort to make me happy. Possibly pursuing a relationship with her.