I fractured my back over a year ago and went on a wild ride of treatments and opiate pain killers. Hydro 5s, 10 then graduated to Percs and then straight on Oxy as the pain worsened. Well it wasn't just the physical pain that brought me to such a ridiculous level of pain medications...my 2+ year relationship (a girl that moved out to Montana to live with me) was falling apart faster than an Afghani cargo transport. So I self medicated for both pains. Well that just made things worse, and I spiraled out of control. I couldnt control myself. Life was pain free and great with the meds, but painful hell on earth when I didnt have them. I felt trapped in their grip, and my mind was the only thing that could relinquish that foothold on my body. After moving home to get better rehabilitation treatment for my back I decided it was finally time to start living my life and did a lot or research (my natural tendancy) on quitting opiates/what you need/amounts and kinds or drugs used and just how much support you need. Through a trused source, I acquired some methadone and alprazolam to slowly wean myself off of the large amount of opiates that I was taking, using the taper method. So far I am 2/3rd the way through the process and I can say that I can feel my life coming back to me. I told my psychiatrist (good, trusted family friend) about my process, and he says that he wants to make sure that I am safe, which he agreed that I am doing the process right. He just wants me to keep him informed and to talk about my thoughts on the situ) I have started my video production company and I feel excited about being free from this death grip soon. Cliffs: Read the bold fellas. I just wanted to share this story because those of you who feel they cannot break the grip, CAN get free.
You need to go to in this order - Doctor Detox (Start 12 step group interactions, counseling) Rehab(Maintain 12 step groups, counseling) Outpatient(maintain 12 step group interactions, counseling) Sadly, if a family friend is a psychiatrist, i doubt he is giving you professional or morally sound advice in not going straight into treatment. As a psych he can not be your friend and his position at the same time, it does not work that way. I also highly doubt he did not tell you to go to a hospital to get off your addiction.
He did want to me to go to detox, but I am already 2/3rds the way through the process and going to a doctor telling them that I illegally purchased meds to do it on my own, isn't really protecting me now is it? He is not MY friend, but a friend of the families, Should have clarified that. I had never met him b4 I went for the first time. He is also talking to a doctor friend of his on how I can do this "right" and not get in trouble.
What? Listen dude, I am a graduate student at NYU focusing on Social Work and my CASAC-t. This shit is not going to fly - do not come here and lie to us about what you are doing. I highly recommend you get your ass to a detox, a rehab and then outpatient treatment as quick as fucking possible. Follow the list I made for you. Detoxing yourself is fucking dangerous and you might DIE. Showing up to a psych hospital to a detox has no legal ramifications whatsoever for you. Go, now. NOW.
What exactly is it, that a detox clinic does that I am not doing? Besides the fact that there are certified MDs and PHDs there, what is it about a 12 step program (which I don't believe in, nor need to be frank with you) that is going to get me "healthy?" I have a huge family that knows about this and is there for me (better than a bunch of strangers) and a PHD who wants me to get this done safely and efficiently? This isnt an attack on your serious advice, just a question I'm posing to you.
Also, I do want to say that I am staying 100% positive throughout this whole process, and that I WANT to get free from this. I'm not depressed, or bored of life anymore, its quite the contrary. This alone, has been a huge catalyst in getting me to SEE that I was druggin myself to get AWAY from my terrible feelings. I no longer need to do that because I work through my emotions and let them be experienced, rather than numbed out. I FEEL AGAIN.
Good job dude, you made a great decision and I hope you stick with it. I believe you can do it by yourself, if you have not been taking too much methadone. My dad kicked his 600mg a day Morphine habit by himself, no detox clinic, no 12 step program, nothing. Just went cold turkey, then once he was clean he canceled his 4,000 pill prescription from the VA. If he can do it, you can do it too bro!