SRS Why does my girlfriend want to go?

I'm deployed to Iraq. I've been in a good relationship with my girlfriend for over a year.

Lately she's been getting restless and wanting to go back to 'the city life' where she's from..

I met her after she moved down to my town to get away from that same city life.....

She says she wants to be with me forever, all that jazz, but is she really committed if she wants to go? She says she wants to go back to school up there and finish up her degree--To better our future together....

I'm afraid this is the beginning of the end of us together. What should I do? I don't want to spend any more time apart from her than we already have.... I don't want to come home on leave and our place place together is gone, and when I finally get home for summer she's back up there

Maybe I deserve it since I left her for this deployment, I don't know, but it's tearing me apart.

 

If you want to keep her you need to let her go and be happy. She's not happy where she is, even if you are there. She wants to grow and better herself and her life. If you try to keep her from that she'll only grow to spite and resent you. If you let her go she might still leave you, but that's not something you can stop, it's love unfortunately

Edit: I just remembered who you are and read your threads fom the Vag. I can't believe you and the gf stayed together this long. You've been too possessive from the start. If you don't learn to let go you'll see every woman will leave and resent you.

 

Cowboy says:
Am I too possessive?
SaRa says:
Not at all
Cowboy says:
k
Cowboy says:
not a little bit?
Cowboy says:
lol
SaRa says:
No I like ur protective side babe
Cowboy says:
Do you resent me for not wanting you to go?
SaRa says:
No.
Cowboy says:
Why did you tell me it made you feel like i didnt care about you when I said just go last time
Cowboy says:
Because that's why Im saying no now
SaRa says:
Lol. Idk.
Cowboy says:
You girl!
SaRa says:
I know huh

 

She tests me like this at least once a month. I know her game now, but I still can't ever win. Are we both crazy or what? I'd say I'm doing something right.

 

Don't nobody give a fuck about you when you're in the sandbox - remember that. I say let her go and see if there's anything left in it when you redeploy stateside.

 

she will cheat on you. cut all losses and find another girl when you get back.

 

It's probably doing the same to her.

Listen, it sounds like you guys are both still college age or younger...in that case, can you blame her for not wanting to stick with you since you are leaving?

Yes, it sounds horrible for me to say it, but she probably wants to be with a guy who will be with her.

 

i'd dump her right now rather than risk getting cheated on

 

Bout to ship out February 11th for the Army, so I have been really cherishing the time I spend with my GF (been together 3 years) because I know shit like this might happen.

 

We are 6 months into this deployment with about 6 to go. We're doing pretty damn good considering the circumstances. Sometimes she tweaks out because she's bored and lonely, but for the most part she's content. Thank God for the Internet, that's all I can say. We're looking forward to my leave coming up in a month or two then coming home a couple of months after that.

 

Good for you two! I'm glad you guys are hanging in there. I've been in her position twice and its never easy for anyone. Enjoy your upcoming time together <3

 

I'm not the type to make assumptions without providing the reasonable alternative. Long distance relationships aren't for everyone, but to assume she would cheat, or be deviant, dishonest, lose interest, or just flat out walk away and dump you because you're deployed just isn't a certainty.

If the bond is there and strong enough, the distance will likely not damage the relationship. It strains bonds, but that tends to strengthen relationships that survive in the event that similar events happen again.

My opinion is to stay the course, enjoy the relationship as long as you have it, and nurture it to the best of your ability by keeping consistent contact. You have a good chance of succeeding if you're honest with each other.