So me and my girlfriend of 1.5 years broke up a little over a month ago. It ended because she felt she had lost trust in me, which stems from me being slightly dishonest about porn, but not cheating or where I was or anything serious like that. Anyways, it was a difficult breakup seeing as how we lived together for 10 months, and she was the first girl I had ever done that with. Anyways, so after the breakup, we talked for a few days here and there and met up once or twice and I tried the whole take me back routine, leaving all my dignity behind. Of course, she still said the trust was gone, and that she couldn't take me back. So I shift into no contact mode, knowing that is the only way to heal. Anyway, after about 3 weeks of no contact she calls me out of the blue. I dont pick up but shoot her a text wanting to know what she wants. She asks me to call her and I do and she admits to still thinking about me everyday, missing me, etc. I knew this was a mistake because it destroyed all the healing I have been trying to do. Anyways, she suggested we meet a few days ago, and I agreed, thinking perhaps she wanted to work things out. I feel like I have been doing a lot of self improvement trying to fix my honesty issues and was thinking this would be a good meeting. We meet and eventually she mentions that she misses me and really wants me to be in her life, but as a friend . I tell her I can not do this because of my feelings, and she has trouble understanding, her reason being that if "you care for someone as much as I care for you, you want them in your life no matter what." I attempted to explain how I can't be in her life unless its as her boyfriend, and then I asked if she wanted to try to work things out. She responded by telling me she still is hurt by the lying and doesnt feel the trust is there, and I asked how can I prove my trust unless I am in her life again as her boyfriend? She said she can't do that yet, and then we sort of went our separate ways. She sent me a few texts just talking about bullshit and whatnot, to which I have not replied, knowing I need to heal. Anyways, I caved today and I asked her why she keeps texting me if she can't be with me? She said "I'm only human." I told her I can not be her friend. She then replied saying that asking if I could be her friend was a way of her gauging if I would be in her life and prove that she could trust me. I guess she wanted to just be friends and see if I have changed? I told her that I can not change the past, only the future and that if she wants to give me another chance, I would like to prove it to her. She replied basically saying "well if I ever feel I can blindly trust you again, I'll let you know." I said "ok, but please stop texting me and let me heal. If you want to try work it out, let me know." Now, I realize I have left ever shred of dignity behind on this one, and could have potentially fucked it up even more by meeting with her. I know the issue here is not another guy, as she was never like that. I guess I need you guys to give me some advice? Do I jsut cut contact? Granted, I truly regret how I acted in the relationship and have tried to better myself. This girl was amazing, and her sense of loyalty was unmatched. I would have married her, and would love to try again. Should I just back off? When I do she claims I dont care or I would have tried to talk to her in the last 3 weeks.. Opinions?