Wow, I was just shaken awake by a bad dream involving this girl I went to high school with (graduated over 5 years ago). I had the biggest crush on this one girls junior and senior year. It never went anywhere because I was a fucking gutless loser who never made a move despite the fact we went on two dates. Toward the end of high school I distanced myself because she made it somewhat clear that she was annoyed by my presence. However I can't just let her go, as stupid as I know it is. I still think about her pretty frequently. Sometimes I'll go months without thinking about her, but it always comes back. Occasionally I go online and try to look up her facebook or myspace page to see what she's up to but I can't find one. To me this girl represents my greatest failure and I can't seem to get over it. Especially with this dream I just had: I dreamed that I was going through the hiring process at the call center I worked at a few years ago. For some reason the HR rep that was doing it was played by my crazy Japanese professor from like 2 years ago. Anyway I nail the job interview and he take me into the HR office where he asks one of the girls to file some paperwork on me. I walk up and realize that it's the girl from highschool sitting behind the desk. She doesn't even look at me, she just turns to her coworker sitting next to her and says "Hey, can you help this guy? I think I'm gonna be sick". The coworker asks her whats wrong and she says "Nothing, just a pathetic loser who runs 5Ks to try and convince people that he's not completely soulless and joyless." I don't even run 5Ks but I want to. Needless to say, I feel like shit this morning.